After finding out about the affair, it is common not to know where to start the healing process and once you learn how to deal with infidelity, surviving an affair will become much easier. Because you are experiencing a crisis after your spouse cheated on you it is hard for you to begin saving your marriage without a good plan to follow.
Break down the process of healing into 3 important phases:
Phase 1: The pain of the injured comes first. Once you learn how to overcome the emotions after infidelity, surviving an affair will have to be done by both of the partners and they will have to build a strong foundation for their marriage and most of all the cheating victim must learn how to deal with the pain caused by the affair.
Phase 2: Start working on the healing process together. In this phase you will have to learn how to communicate effectively with your partner and it is challenging because both implication is needed for positive results. Once you know how to cope with infidelity, surviving after the affair will have to be a team work because you may have a lot of anger still trapped inside of you and it will take a lot of effort from both of you to work on your communication skills.
Phase 3: Begin rebuilding your marriage. After you and your spouse are able to communicate in a more positive manner after infidelity, surviving the affair will need less efforts and when all the negative feelings are gone only then you will be able to rebuild a solid foundation for your marriage. In this phase you will have to focus on rebuilding trust and learning how to be more transparent.
Working on saving your marriage will never stop and this rebuilding phase will become a solidifying phase that need to be active all the time so you will never have to deal with infidelity and surviving an affair.
The most important thing is that you will need help in learning how to deal with infidelity, surviving the affair and rebuilding the trust that is lost because in the moment after you found out about the affair nothing will be the same and you wouldn't be able to control your feelings and that is why you and your spouse will need professional guidance if you want your efforts to have the right results and survive the affair.
If you want more information on how to survive an affair after your spouse cheated on you, this is a great resource: http://www.surviving-affair.com
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