Chelsea Kaplan wrote an article titled “Are You The Last One Single?” One of her pieces of advice attempted to answer the question: How can single women project confidence when inside, they’re panicking? She recommends that a woman “project a radiantly positive persona, date with dignity, and transform any desperation sensations into high desirability–that’s how to reign in the Panic.”
From personal experience, this is not something you just do. Using my Love Triangle, it first requires you have clear Awareness (the 1st side of the triangle) of what you’re doing and feeling. Once you become aware, you can then shift your Intention (the second side of the triangle) so that you have more choice in how you are responding inside.
An example would be the following:
You’re with a man you find attractive. This adds pressure because you want to be sure he likes you. You begin to feel the inner panic that he might not be interested in you, which causes you to slip into a state of insecurity. If you are not aware that this is going on, you will most likely not be attractive to him because men like women who are confident, at ease with themselves, and comfortable to be with.
But once you notice you’re beginning to feel the discomfort of insecurity, you have moved into a state of awareness. That’s when you can do something about it, which is to shift your intention. To do that you could tell yourself to relax and breathe. Or you could shift your concern for yourself over to him and that he might be feeling insecure as well. Or you could imagine loving energy going from your heart to his.
This will cause a shift in your Energy (the 3rd side of the Love Triangle). When you are in a state of insecurity, what Kaplan calls Panic, your energy is quite unattractive to men, even repellent. So with any shift in Awareness you allow yourself the option of shifting your Intention, which can then cause your Energy to go from repellent to attractive so much so, that the man you’re with could very well be so drawn to you that you become irresistible.
When you can do the above, dating becomes fun. That’s when you have choices, that’s when you feel fully empowered as the magnificent woman you’re capable of being. My course, From Flirting To Forever teaches women how to shift their energy from ” repellent panic” to “attractive Feminine Grace.”
If you want to know if a man is a Caveman, a Dog, a Prince, or all three, be sure and download my 3 free ebooks at KaraOh.com.
Kara Oh, Relationship coach, best-selling author and public speaker, offers a full range of products and services to assist women and men with everything they need to create fulfilling relationships that are filled with love, playfulness, romance and passion. Whether you are single and looking for the right partner, involved and frustrated, or married and struggling with everything from an affair to falling out of love, her unique resources offer everything that you need to enjoy the kind of relationship you
desire.
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