THOSE INSIDIOUS PARADIGMS-HOW TO SHIFT THEM
We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are.
~Anais Nin
Our Paradigms create our Reality
"Your paradigm is so intrinsic to your mental process that you are hardly aware of its existence, until you try to communicate with someone with a different paradigm." ~Donella Meadows
Our paradigms are the filter through which we see our reality. Paradigms are often sub-conscious beliefs handed down to us by others. We pick up these beliefs often as young children, well before we truly understand them intellectually.
We can go through our life with these filters on and not even know how much they affect us. As we become more aware and conscious, and particularly if we have done some personal development, we begin to realize how much we have acted out our lives due to old paradigms.
Awareness is Required First
I had a client who started a home-based graphic design company and had been in his business about one year when he came to see me. He had made progress and felt he had a good business. With each success, no matter how small, he had an attitude of gratitude. Then he hit a roadblock and began to feel overwhelmed. He kept taking steps but was not seeing the results he wanted. He began to realize that he was up against a very big block yet was not sure what it was. Through coaching, and meditation, he discovered he was looking at a long held paradigm about not deserving success. His problem was quite common and once he realized his paradigms, he began to take steps to shift it.
We all have some beliefs that no longer serve us. In fact, they keep us playing small. We will come up against these beliefs, sometimes when things have been going quite well. What can we do to shift? Here are a few paradigm shifter ideas:
Ask Powerful Questions and then Listen For the Answers:
There is no problem without a solution, no question without an answer. You may not know what to do next or have the answer yet, but it will come. When you really understand this concept you can begin to relax, knowing your answer is coming.
There are countless examples of this throughout history. All our advancements have come because people kept searching for ways to accomplish things. Thomas Edison had 2000 “failures” before he came up with the light bulb. He keep asking questions and tweaking his experiments.
Our first computer weighted 30 tons and took up 1800 square feet. Through all the technological advancements in the last 5 decades we now have hand held and compact computers with even greater capabilities.
The way to create the light bulb and the compact computer always existed before they became a reality, but people did not have the awareness of them yet. They were still using the oil lamp or the mega computers.
When you are facing your doubts and fears you might ask for guidance to move through them. What could/would you do if you didn't believe these old paradigms? Who could you ask for help? What would someone you admire do? The point is, there is an answer that you can access when the timing is right. Be patient and kind to yourself as you would to a young, toddler just learning to walk.
Old Paradigms Can Only Have Power If We Continue To Believe Them
My parents grew up during the depression and their views on life were shaped by a fear of not having money. I grew up being taught that having security in the form of a good paying job was paramount over personal satisfaction and happiness with your career/life. My father stayed in a career he disliked for 2 decades. I had incorporated this belief about security at all costs into my career choices. Even when I no longer had any passion for my career as a social worker I was afraid to make a change.
In 2005, a defining event forever changed me. I realized that I was living out of fear and playing very small and I choose to make a leap. I looked at the security paradigm and knew it no longer was true for me. Happiness and passion for my career became paramount over financial security at any cost.
Feed Your Faith and Starve Your Fear
Be aware of what you are putting your attention on. If you have uncovered an old paradigm that no longer serves you, come up with another idea that will support you to move through the fear. If you focus on the fear and feed it, your energy will be lower. You will often lack the motivation and hold back from taking action that moves you towards your dream. You will not feel good and this often show up in our physical body as ailments/illness.
There is an Native American story that illustrates this well. A young man went to the tribal chief and said, "There are 2 dogs at war inside me. One is good and kind and the other is angry and jealous. Who will win? The chief looked kindly at the young man and answered, "The one you feed will win so choose wisely."
Shift To An Awareness That We Are Much More Than Our Human Experience
As spiritual beings having a human experience, created in the image and likeness of God/Spirit, we have so much more power than we realize. We just need to recognize this power and tap into it more frequently. Common ways to tap into our source power are through meditation/prayer, being in gratitude, and being in service to others. Everyone will have their own path. When we tap into our God/Spirit-given power our life naturally changes and we experience life from a higher plateau.
Using a few of these ideas will give us a stronger belief in our abilities and support us in shifting these paradigms for good. We are powerful and capable. Live from that awareness!
I am a Certified Life Coach working with professional women who are in the process of becoming entrepreneurs, changing careers or who need support in their current position. I also support individuals with whatever goals or challenges they face. I enjoy working 1:1, but am available for group coaching sessions as well.
My background includes 30 years of combined experience in social work, mediation, counseling and advocacy. In these complimentary careers, I have supported many people with diverse backgrounds and needs. My services are strictly confidential and are held either in my home office or over the phone.
I love helping others reach their goals and re-discover the magic that makes them the unique person they truly are. We are all born with this magic and an understanding of our own inner wisdom. As we “grow up” and stop listening to our own inner voice and start listening to others instead we “forget” how magnificent we truly are. My approach is to listen to you and support you in re-discovering the you that you were meant to be.