How to Talk to Your Teenage Son About Relationships

Talk to Your Teenage Son About Relationships
Parents, teachers, and other adults often focus more on the sexual aspects of teen relationships out of a concern regarding sexually transmitted diseases (STD's) and teen pregnancy. There is, on the other hand, too little time spent on teaching young men about relationships and their role as a date or a boyfriend. This article touches on how to teach teen males about what goes into having a healthy and positive relationship that is not about sex.
1.
o 1
Be open and honest when you talk to your teen son about relationships. Find a comfortable setting to talk to your son in, either inside or outside the home. If you have other children make sure they are not around during your talk as this might be embarrassing to your son and make an open and honest talk difficult.
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If you have a spouse or other adult you have been in a long term relationship with see if they would be willing to be a part of the conversation with your son so that he can hear about your relationship together and the positives that have made the relationship work well.
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Explain to your son that building a relationship takes time and that he should begin by getting to know the girl, her likes and dislikes, her habits, as well as her strengths and weaknesses. Tell him he should also take the time to find out what the girl expects from a relationship.
o 4
If you have been in a long term marriage or other long term relationship talk to your teen son about the positive qualities this person has and how you were drawn to them. Explain how your partner has treated you well. This will help your son have a base to build on in any current or future relationship.
o 5
Since domestic violence is also a growing problem in teen relationships, make sure and take some time to talk to your son about the right way to handle arguments and fights with a girlfriend. Help him to understand that walking away from a potentially volatile situation is always the best solution. If there is a problem, he should tell his girl friend that they will talk later when the two of them are not so angry.
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Talk to your son about the importance of asking a girlfriend for their opinion on things like where to go on a date. Help him learn that shared decisions are a part of a healthy and respectful relationship.
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Your teen son should learn to respect any decision a girlfriend should make in terms of their relationship, as well. You should stress the importance of talking to each other about everything regarding their relationship in order to be fair.
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Whether adults approve or not, sex is often a part of teen relationships. Tell your son that it is wrong and disrespectful to try and manipulate a girlfriend into having sex; if she says no to any advances he might make, he is to respect her decision and not try to change her mind.
o 9
Let your son know If you were to find out that your son had manipulated a girl into having a physical relationship she did not want or hit her, serious consequences will be attached.
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Hopefully, your teen son will not get a girlfriend pregnant. If, unfortunately, this should happen you should make your son understand that since he was part of the act that had such a tragic result, he also needs to do his part in assuring that his child is taken care of whether or not he and the girl continue to have a relationship.
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Breaking up is usually a part of being a teen and with the heightened emotions that come with the teen years, you need to prepare your teen son to handle the breakup. You need to communicate to your son that he and his peers are constantly growing and changing as they learn more about themselves, about others, and about the world around them. Help him understand that sometimes that process includes breaking up, no matter which one of them ends the relationship.
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If you have a daughter, a good way to end the discussion with your son is to tell him to think about how he would want a boyfriend to treat his sister. If he does not have a sister, you can have your son think about how he would want a cousin or friend to be treated in a relationship. This will give your son an immediate opportunity to consider how he should treat a girlfriend.
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Give your son an opportunity to break in at any time to ask questions or to share his thoughts and opinions.

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