Women often wonder why men don’t listen. There are a number of possibilities, one of which could be that your voice is irritating. If you have a whiny, high-pitched, nasal sound that is reminiscent of a poorly-tuned violin, then the image you are projecting is definitely not one of warmth, attraction, or authority.
What is fascinating about the speaking voice is that you have a better voice inside of you which is resonant, more mature in sound, and most likely deeper in pitch. To find it, you will have to learn how to power your voice by means of your chest cavity.
At present, you (and 99% of the population) are unaware of the power and presence of your speaking voice because you are using only 4 of your 5 resonators to produce voiced sound. Those 4 cavities include your voice box, throat, mouth and nasal passages. The one that is missing is your chest. When you consider the size of those 4 resonators, they cannot compare to the vastness of your chest cavity which is where your real source of power originates for good phonation.
A voice that is being powered and amplified correctly would sound like that of George Clooney, Kathleen Turner, Sean Connery or Kate Beckinsale. And the one common characteristic all of these voices share is warmth. No excessive nasality – no high-pitch – no whiny qualities. It is this warmth that captivates their listeners’ ears.
Given the right tone, these voices can also be very sexy and seductive. When the studio searched for a voice for the role of Jessica Rabbit in the 1988 movie Who Framed Roger Rabbit, they didn’t ask Fran Drescher or Melanie Griffith!
If your goal is to project the best image possible, both professionally and personally, what image is your voice projecting? What does your speaking voice say about you? Keep in mind that your voice accounts for 37% of that image. In answering this question, understand that you must judge your sound by what you hear on your voicemail or answering machine – not the sound you hear in your head. Your friends, family, acquaintances and colleagues recognize you by the voice you hear on your recording equipment, not the one you hear in your head.
While it is definitely possible that men may not be listening for other reasons, ask yourself if the sound of your voice is the culprit. They say you can attract more bees with honey than with vinegar. That being the case, you might consider voice training if your voice is an irritant and not an attraction.
The Voice Lady Nancy Daniels offers private, corporate and group workshops in voice and presentation skills as well as Voicing It!, the only video training program on voice improvement. If you would like to see and hear a dramatic change, from childlike to mature, watch Trish's 'Before & After' video clip.