Goals That Help and Goals That Hinder

Short-term goals, long-term goals, decisions and choices. What to do?

Have your goals, and yes, write them down. The short-term goals should get you to your long-term goal, but keep your eye on the long-term goal, as if you were jumping hurdles. The long-term goal is the line to cross at the end, and the short-term goals are the hurdles. If you stop and look at each hurdle you're trying to cross, well, you know what will happen. So remember what the long-term goal is and don't let what goes on with the short-term goals stop your forward motion.

For instance, when you're changing the oil in your car ... no, sorry I'm going to have to use a pie-baking example. To bake a good apple pie you have to measure flour, sugar, butter, salt and pare and core apples, but you can be a bit off on your measurements at any point and still come out fine.

As to commitment and choice, you always have the right to change your mind. Your dreams and plans may change over your lifespan, as will your financial needs, and priorities, and sometimes even your values. Remember that life lives you as much as you live life. In pursuing one goal you may gain skills you decide you'd rather apply elsewhere, and you will still end up in a good place.

Work with a coach to get clarification for your specific situation. You want to be committed to your goals, but you also need to keep checking in on how you feel about what you're heading for, and use your emotional intelligence. That’s the difference between being determined, and being a fanatic. Know how to start but also know how to stop. Give yourself permission to make mistakes, so you'll be able to risk, and also to self-correct.

Use the win-stay, lose-shift philosophy. If you've got a winning strategy, stick with it. If you're losing, shift. Your intuitions and your feelings will guide you when you're attuned to them. That's what they're there for.