How often do we find ourselves in awkward situations we could have avoided simply by saying "no"? It is only after getting into those situations that we remember the simple act of saying "no" would have kept us totally out of them.
Your time and peace of mind are invaluable. There are times when others are in such desperate need we would willingly take food away from our own children or take time we think we cannot spare to help them.
However, you will find the greatest demand for your time and efforts come from those who are fully capable of doing or providing for themselves. It is simply easier for them to ask you to provide or do it for them.
Some would consider it selfish to deny others. Which helps them the most? For you to do or provide it for them or for them to do or provide for themselves? It always returns to the old and proven saying that, "If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day, but if you teach him to fish you feed him for a lifetime."
You better serve yourselves and others when you make judicious use of the word "no". If that word isn't in your vocabulary you need to add it.
It is human nature to seek the easy way out. The biggest problem with this approach is that it keeps us from growing and evolving into being all we are capable of being.
Every time we do something for ourselves we better learn to do it and it becomes easier. We then find greater challenges which stretch us even further. It is when we are given a "no" to our requests that we find ways and means to fulfill them ourselves.
It is not always comfortable to tell someone "no". On the other hand, it becomes relatively comfortable when you look ahead to the consequences you will endure by saying "yes" to their requests.
The next time you feel like you have to say "yes" to someone's request for your time, money and/or efforts, think ahead to what you will feel like while going through the consequences of having said "yes". If you find it will be more comfortable than saying "no", then by all means proceed with it. Otherwise, keep your "no" handy and use it.
Copyright 2001 by Robert Taylor
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