Can parenting be exhausting, nerve wrecking, challenging and a drain on every other aspect of your life? Yes it can.
Parenting can also be rewarding, exciting, fun, a source of great learning and a means of staying young, energized and happy. We as parents are trained by media, politicians, TV, experts, to fear, to feel anxious and to worry. Is that really necessary?
I don't think so. I sat in a hall with 20,000 others one time, listening to the Dalai Lama. He was asked a question about illness and how to address the uncertainty, worry. His answer was simple and reflected on whether you have control over things in your life.
"If you can't do anything about, if your doctors can not do anything about it, there is no sense in worrying. If you can do something about it or your doctors can, there is no need to worry either." It is the same with parenting. We have been so trained to see danger, fear, worry and protect. It has shifted us from seeing childhood as that wonderful time to childhood being a time for parents to worry until the kids leave home (and then worry some more). Childhood is a time of exploration, fantasy, laughter and joy, learning and finding the great talent, the special you inside. Of experimenting with boundaries and skills, capacities. I would like to offer you three ways in which you can bring back more sense of joy into your days as a parent. So every day can be a good day.
1. Every day think about things you like, love about your child as you get up and as you go to sleep. It will frame your day in this delight of seeing the wonderful in your child.
2. Focus your attention on what good and great, fun and exciting you would like to happen today for your child and help them create it. Even small things, when focused on the fun, the adventure feel different to all.
3. Take time every day to realize what you are grateful for. Celebrate successes, however small. BY seeing what you are grateful for, your - and your child's- successes you will feel happier, more confident and better able to deal with life as it comes at you.
This approach is a proven way of increasing joy in your life. Your brain sees more of what you focus on.
You attract more of what you focus on.
It takes a bit of practice, but wouldn't that be worth it? To look at your children, every day, to reflect as you feel asleep and know:
Today was a good day. And so will be tomorrow.
Wouter van der Hall is the author of The Parent Program and a Parent Coach.
Wouter has coached people since 1988 and has put his wealth of experience in working with children and families together with the tools corporations pay thousands of dollars per person for to assist parents inbeing the great parent they can be.
www.theparentprogram.com
will give you easy access to positive parenting attitudes, tools and skills. The Parent Program is a 15 minute a day email/web based parenting program. You will feel more relaxed, confident and competent as you deal with parenting issues. 24/7 accessible at home and anywhere, so in your time, pace and comfort. To help YOU become the great parent you can be.