Being a mom requires us to play many roles throughout the day. We’re mom, wife, caregiver, employee, housekeeper, chef, and taxi driver. And the list could go on and on. It’s no wonder that we’re so stressed out and tired all the time! Rather than looking forward to the future when our kids will move out and our lives will slow down, we can actively work to combat our overscheduled lives and attempt to find a healthy balance right now.
Learn to say “no”. The word “no” is one of the most powerful words in the English language and yet we don’t use it as often as we should. We try to be people pleasers, keep the peace, and not offend anyone - all at the expense of our time and our sanity. One of the things we don’t realize though is that saying no often opens up the space for us to say yes to something we truly want to do. I realize that saying “yes” is a difficult habit to break but it can be done. If you find it difficult to instantly say “no”, buy yourself some time with an “I need to think about it” response. This response potentially serves two purposes: 1) it gives you time to think carefully and consider whether or not this is something you really want to take on and 2) it lets the other person know that you have some hesitation about saying yes. Remember that “no” is a complete sentence.
Look carefully at your schedule. It’s a good idea to evaluate your schedule periodically and question what fills your day. If your daily activities aren’t in line with your values, priorities, and goals, eliminate or change those activities. Many women tend to fill their days with busyness that doesn’t mean anything to them personally and this leaves no time for activities that are important to them. Depending on your current schedule, eliminating or reducing time spent on one or two activities may be enough to create more free time in your day.
Take time for yourself. This is perhaps one of the most important things you can do to help take care of everyone else. Self-care is what relaxes, refreshes, and renews our minds, bodies, and spirits. Yet, with our busy schedules, we often skip taking time for ourselves and end up paying the price for it. We are better equipped to care for others when we have taken care of ourselves. Even a few minutes each day could be enough to improve your attitude and resharpen your focus. Trying reading a book, meditating, exercising, talking to a friend, taking a bath, or anything that recharges your batteries. Everyone around you will benefit from it.
Learn to delegate. You don’t have to do everything yourself. Many of the day to day things we do can be delegated to someone else. If you can afford to, hire a cleaning service to handle all of the big cleaning around the house. Hire a teenager to mow your lawn. Enlist the help of your family to help with daily chores. Even young children are capable of helping out with certain jobs. It is surprising how much quicker four people can finish cleaning than only one.
Use technology wisely. Although technology has advanced our society in many ways we never thought possible, it has also led to us feeling the need to be available 24/7. Between cell phones and email, we can be reached virtually anywhere at anytime. It is very helpful to establish boundaries on the use of technology. You may want to turn your cell phone off at certain times (perhaps during dinner or after 8 PM). If anyone calls during these times, they will still have the option to leave you a message. Restrict email usage to certain hours as well. Checking and responding to email as it arrives takes up more time that we realize and keeps us from using our time in more productive ways. If you feel the need to be more responsive, try using the auto-response feature on your email to inform senders that you will respond to email between 3 and 5 PM or some other convenient time for you.
By taking action on any of these tips, you will be able to create more time during your day. Being a mother can be one of the most rewarding jobs on the planet – be sure to take time and enjoy it!
April Mims is a life and career coach specializing in work/life balance issues and life and career transitions. Her coaching practice is Nexus Coaching Partners. She is passionate about empowering clients to balance the demands of a successful career and a strong family life. April invites you to a complimentary 30-minute coaching session to see if coaching could benefit you. To learn more or subscribe to The Nexus Connection newsletter, visit www.nexuscoachingpartners.com.