Acceptance of events or other people is key to our emotional freedom. It is an emotional process to realize that we don't have control over situations or people and we stop resisting.
I originally believed that acceptance meant I needed to like a situation and that I was okay with the outcome. That statement couldn't be further from the truth. Acceptance does NOT mean I need to like a situation, an outcome or even a person. Acceptance is an understanding that the situation is what it is or a person is the way they are and I stop resisting.
This is an emotional process that takes time. For me, I need to talk about a situation or person. I don't want to complain about a situation or attempt to change an outcome; I talk about me letting go. By letting go, I am not emotionally invested and I don't waste time or energy.
There is a woman I know that always wants to be the center of attention. She drives me crazy. Someone could be celebrating a huge event in their life, sharing their enthusiasm and this woman has a way of shifting the celebration of the other person to a 'just like me' experience she had. I allow her to suck away my ability to celebrate the other person's experience.
It takes a lot for me not to say something to her and the worst part is that I replay the conversation over and over in my head building resentment long after the conversation is over. Clearly not in a place of acceptance and clearly am not emotionally free.
So What Do I do?
For me, I talk about it to people I can confide in and I journal. I know I can't change the woman; I need to change my perspective. Once that happens, acceptance settles in and I am emotionally free.
For me, the reason why this one grates on me so much is that I use to be like her. I wanted to be constantly basking in the limelight. I came to an understanding of this immature behavior years ago and changed my behavior. But when I see someone exhibiting the same behavior it drives me crazy. I get the righteous attitude of 'I changed; why can't you'.
What helps me in accepting this woman's behavior is changing my perspective. Today I believe that she was put in front of me as a reminder of what I use to be like and not to revert back to that behavior. So when in situations where she starts monopolizing; I have to bring this thought to the forefront on my mind. What I find is instead of feeling a resentment building; I find gratitude filling my heart that I no longer behave this way.
I walk away from the conversation; being in a place of gratitude. Now that is freedom.
Debbi Dickinson is a professional woman who knows the struggles of integrating different aspects of your life. Using her own life as living proof that extraordinary choices lead to an amazing life, she helps other women do the same. She empowers other professional women not to compromise to live an extraordinary life. For additional information, please join her at http://.steppingintojoy.com