3 ways to Create True Happiness

Hiking the mountain range behind my home is where I often receive my most inspired ideas. The other morning, a phrase bolted into my head in a very dramatic fashion just as I reached the apex of my climb. Standing there, scanning the horizon, satisfied with my morning’s accomplishment, clear as day in my mind I heard: Look Good, Feel Good, Do Good.

When the phrase popped into my mind, it was clear to me that it was more than a phrase, but a motto, a rally cry and the path to true happiness for women. That’s it, I thought - this is what women want! We want to better ourselves, access our potential, be happy and become more and more of the woman we sense we can be. We want to Look Good, Feel Good and Do Good!

As a coach, speaker and teacher, I’m always asking myself how can I communicate everything I know, have witnessed or experienced in such a way that it helps women find their path to happiness and ultimately their true self. This phrase seemed to bring my message through in such a clear and succinct way! I started to make my way down the mountain, feeling great about my new discovery.

Each step I took allowed me to grasp more of the essence of what Look Good, Feel Good, Do Good really means to women. I sensed it was more than just the obvious - yes of course, we have all said, I just want to look good or why can’t I feel better? But, by truly embracing it as a motto, and going deeper, we open ourselves up to new possibilities of our own power, potential and true happiness.

I started to remember that years ago as I was going through my own personal transformation - evolving into more and more of myself - people who hadn’t seen me for a long time would always ask me if I had lost weight. Now, what girl doesn’t want to hear that?!

It was the first thing they would say upon seeing me and when I would say I hadn’t, they would give me this confused look. Sometimes, they would even argue with me, convinced I just wasn’t admitting it! At that time, I hadn’t actually lost any weight, but because of the inner transformation that took place, I appeared completely different on the outside. It became such a great lesson for me that looking good is more than the surface.

For us women, it’s about the energy and essence we are showing the world. It’s our glow, our radiance and our presence. That’s real beauty - that’s the essence of looking good. Ever meet a woman who is stunning but not a perfect size 6? She has a quality and presence about her that is more than just her size.

Ok so how do you get inner radiance you might be asking? The first tip I have for you is to bump up your self care. Most women leave self care to the bottom of the list and it only happens if they have time. Try moving one or two things to the top of your list. Whether you’re relaxing with lotions and potions, diving into a juicy book, meditating or exercising, all of these things bring a sense of value and appreciation to your being.

Remember hearing all of those financial gurus say that if you want to build wealth, you have to start by paying yourself first? They would encourage you with every paycheck to automatically put some into savings. It’s kind the same idea when it comes to self care. The time that you put into self care, becomes an investment in yourself. And when we invest in ourselves, we radiate and when we radiate, we’re happier.

So the first way to create true happiness is to Look Good by cultivating your inner radiance.

By now, I’m about halfway home and I’m really starting to love this idea of Look Good, Feel Good, Do Good. It seems that the more I ponder it, the bigger it gets. I start to realize that for so many women, looking good has been a way to try to feel good. Makes sense. We have all been bombarded with ads and images of good looking people and they never seem unhappy or depressed! The two are so interrelated and especially for us women, we cannot have one without the other.

Just as there are a million products promising that you’ll look good if you use them, there are just as many promising that you’ll feel good. Antidepressants are actually the most often prescribed medication in this country so clearly there are a lot of people wanting to feel better.

In working with different women, I’ve discovered some common patterns around feeling good. Most women feel happiest when they are honoring themselves. When we are not trying to be perfect, or unemotional or everything to everyone, but when we allow ourselves to simply be real. Which includes embracing all the different parts of ourselves - even the ones we think are wrong, unpleasant or unattractive.

Is there a part of you that you would be willing to embrace today? Can you be more accepting of your emotions? Can you allow yourself to ask for help? Can you take some time to just be and not do? These type of shifts create space for us to be more and more authentic which always leads to a greater sense of peace and happiness.

So honoring yourself leads to Feeling Good which becomes the second way to create true happiness.

When women look and feel good from the inside out, a desire emerges to give back in some way. Whether that’s in her own family, in her career or as a volunteer, when we are at our best, we are natural givers and want to help others be their best too. So its only natural that doing good becomes the next stage in true happiness. By now I’m running down the mountain, excited to get home and allow my ideas to tumble onto the paper!

What I love about the concept of doing good is that there are infinite possibilities. We can go big or small, regular or once - there are numerous ways to do good in the world. From a warm hello, to doing something for a friend or family member or starting a new project or community - we are only limited by our imagination.

For some women, they would like to contribute, but often think they don’t have the time, energy or resources. If this is true for you, I would encourage you to look at what you have in abundance and begin to give a bit of that back. Maybe you have some extra time to help someone out or have a few extra dollars to donate or can use your energy to send positivity to someone in need. In this way, you are sharing your abundance to create even more.

Or you might start by exploring what you think is missing in your world. Remember the famous quote by Ghandi of “Be the change you wish to see in the world”? Notice where you want to see changes. Ask yourself: How I be a catalyst for the very thing that I desire or want more of? Who do I feel most called to help out? How can I bring a lasting contribution to the world? Your answers will guide you to a place where you can do good, and in the process, create a sense of purpose.
The third and final way to create true happiness is to Do Good
in the world.

By Looking Good, Feeling Good & Doing Good, women guide themselves into a profound sense of true happiness.