Parenting Solutions to Time-outs & Rules for Your Child or Teenager

If you have done any parenting style or parenting solution research at all, you will have found Supernanny Jo Frost all over the internet, including YouTube. When I was raising my children Supernanny Jo Frost was my hero and still is today! What if her child rearing philosophy could be enhanced with new, state of the art, positive parenting solutions that would bring even better results with your child or teenager?

When Supernanny Jo Frost was working with the DeMello family in April of 2009 she showed the mom how to stand up and show the kid who is boss! That is awesome and necessary for many parents out there today who believe their sole job as a parent is to keep their children happy. This is a huge mistake!

In every episode we, as parents, learn how to do a proper time-out, how to take control as a parent with our voice and actions, and how to hold off anger and frustration with our children. Is there a way to empower our children to greater self-image, self-discipline and confidence versus disempowering them with punishment? The answer is absolutely yes! There is a way to empower your child every day and still have your child display the good, quiet and cooperative behavior you seek.

Time-outs, removal of privileges, and yelling are all forms of punishment to children. Traditional punishment techniques will work with small children and they will work temporarily, but eventually these techniques will steal the child’s innocence and self-confidence. I asked Thomas to watch the YouTube video and share how Supernanny could create even more success.

Here are 3 Parenting Style Secrets from Thomas’ Creating Champions for Life philosophy that enhance Supernanny’s outdated punishment techniques.

1. Ask your child questions instead of dictating to them.

If your child is running and screaming around the house and horseplaying with their siblings, 9 times out of 10, they are yelled at, reprimanded and then put in a time-out. This tells the child that running and yelling are bad, and you and I both know it’s not; it’s good for them to exercise and explore their loud voice. Where is a great place to practice using horseplay and their loud voice?

The next time your child is running around the house, screaming and horseplaying with his sibling, you just capture their attention and ask, “Little Timmy, where is the best place for loud voice and horseplay? Is it inside the house, in the library, or outside in the back yard?” Little Timmy will know the answer and immediately go outside to yell and scream. This way, he is not on a naughty mat, embarrassed; he is encouraged, praised and loved for being who he is. A little boy who likes to yell, run and play.

2. Know the reward that is important to your child.

Know the reward of what is important to your child or teenager and you have fuel to motivate them into the action of learning life skills. In this clip Supernanny Jo Frost takes the family to a library. The parents are afraid that their misbehaving children will act up and they will feel embarrassed. Jo explains to take 5 minutes to cover the rules before entering the library. Thumbs up, Supernanny!!!

Creating Champions for Life philosophy says to know the reward for your child when pre-framing. This is always focusing on using positive energy to achieve the same outcome of self-discipline you are looking for at the library. You ask your child, “Little Timmy, what is important for you to experience today at the library?” Little Timmy will say something like “I’d like to get a book about spiders, Mom!” “Okay, great, Timmy, I would love for you to have a book about spiders! What kind of behavior is correct to use in the library?” Little Timmy will always answer, “Inside behavior, Mom.” Your child is very, very intelligent. Make it his choice to behave and he will behave in order to receive his reward, the book about spiders from the library.

3. Parents make decisions and children make choices.

Children do not have the ability to make decisions because they cannot think abstractly yet. You cannot ask your child, “What do you want for supper?” if you want them to eat nutritious food. They will always default to McDonalds, Pizza or some other junk food. They will, however, always pick something good to eat if you make the decisions first and then offer your child their three choices.

Say you want little Timmy to eat vegetables at supper. Supernanny suggests that they just take little bites while you encourage them to give it a shot. This is still your decision and you are still dictating what is important to you, that you want them to eat vegetables. So, make a parent approved decision about what is important to you and ask them, “When we have dinner tonight, would you like to have peas, corn or carrots?” He will answer, “Ummm...how about carrots?” Wow! He just asked for carrots. I promise little Timmy will eat all of the vegetables on his plate tonight!