What is Sunday night like in your house? Do you spend it trying to pretend tomorrow isn’t Monday? Do you make an endless to do list for the coming week? Do you get a stomachache just thinking about tomorrow? Do you pace your house because you can’t fall asleep? Or do you stay up until you’re bleary-eyed watching TV or surfing the web to keep your mind occupied?
How ever you spend your Sunday night, for many of us, our Sunday night ritual could use a little makeover. Many people are spending lots of time and energy worrying about the economy, their bank accounts and how they will pay their next bill. Some are even feeling helpless and depressed as they go to a job they hate but can’t leave.
The Sunday night ritual is completely understandable- even when it runs into Monday night and beyond. Lately turning on the TV, opening the paper, surfing the web, talking to friends (in person or virtually), and even going to a bar can knock you off your feet- and not in a good way. We are inundated with breaking (and not so breaking) news about the state of our economy and it seems to be all people talk about. Even the latest discussion about the health care plan reverts back to a discussion about how much it will cost us. It seems that the phrase “that’s not something we can afford now” fits into almost any conversation with almost anyone these days! Although I am quite pleased to see the shift where talking about your money is becoming less taboo, this Sunday night ritual, complete with aches, pains, and “pills”, has got to stop!
First, let’s consider why the ritual exists. What does the Sunday night ritual accomplish? For some people, it may serve as a distraction from thinking about something that is worrying you even more than bills. For others, it may simply provide a routine for your unstructured Sunday night? It may be something that developed over such a long time you can’t even remember not doing it and can’t figure out why you keep doing it. Some people might say the ritual prepares them for the week of work and stress ahead.
After you have made an educated guess as to why you maintain your Sunday night ritual, I’d like you to close your eyes for just a second and imagine it now. What do you feel and where in your body do you feel it? Most importantly do you feel relaxed, focused, and energized imagining yourself in your Sunday night? Or are you shoulders hunched up near your ears, are there butterflies in your stomach, are you sweating? Do you just want to open your eyes and stop pretending it’s Sunday night? I asked you this because it’s important to recognize how Sunday night makes you feel and think- instead of just going through it week after week wishing for Friday. If you had mainly positive or generally relaxed feelings and thoughts while doing this exercise, great!
For the rest of you, it’s time to start opening your eyes. You don’t have to keep up your Sunday night ritual- you don’t have to dread Mondays! You do need to take notice of what you were feeling physically and emotionally and what thoughts popped in your head so we can turn your ritual into a much anticipated and even treasured moment in your week. So tonight tune in to how you’re spending your time before bed, what you’re feeling physically and emotionally, and what thoughts are going round and round in your head. Jot down your impressions in a notebook by your bed or send yourself an email (for those of you who forgot what a spiral-bound notebook is!). Come back to visit my blog next Sunday to learn the next step in transforming your sickening Sunday night ritual into something sweet!
Dr. Kelly Romirowsky is a licensed psychologist who brings to the table a wide scope of training and experience.
She holds a BA in Psychology from Rutgers University (2001). She continued her formal education at Widener University, where she earned a Masters in Clinical Psychology (2004) and a Psy. D. with concentration in Industrial/Organizational Psychology as well as School Psychology certification (2006).
Dr. Romirowsky was honored with numerous awards and scholarships throughout her academic career, including the Leadership and Citizenship Award (2005) and the Academic Achievement Scholarship (2001-2004) from the Institute for Graduate Clinical Psychology at Widener University. She was a member of various honor societies, including Phi Beta Kappa (2000) and Omicron Delta Kappa National Leadership Honors Society (2004).
In addition to extensive credentials in research, organizational performance, academic assessment and counseling, Dr. Romirowsky also has a solid background in leading professional development seminars, coaching and public speaking. She has been recognized with honors both in and out of the university setting and has cultivated an impressive curriculum vitae.
In 2006, Dr. Romirowsky established the Evaluation and Research department of the Jewish Federation of Greater Philadelphia -- the only Jewish federation in North America with a department devoted to evaluating the impact of funded programs. She does ongoing work with the JFGP managing the department, consulting with grantees, establishing policy and procedure, training colleagues and consulting on all external research studies.