According to Wikipedia, connection is “a relationship in which a person, thing, or idea is linked or associated with something else.” This directly relates to a fundamental leadership skill: the ability to connect.
Everything a leader does, requires connection. Vision, strategy and execution require connection. Getting things done through people requires connection.
Leaders are able to lead when they can connect to a vision and inspire others to act in service of it.
Yet connecting to vision is just the beginning. For a leader to inspire others towards action, there must also be a human connection. Leaders who inspire large scale change demonstrate the ability to connect with people on multiple levels; intellectual, social, spiritual and emotional.
Connection with others is the springboard for co-creating results. Leaders who fail to connect rely on a directive, authoritative style to drive results. Although this can produce short-term actions, it strips desire, drive and creativity from the process. People don’t like being told what to do; they like being invited to share what they think, imagine and care about. Connection is the force to access that spark in others.
According to an article on Leadership and Connection by Michel Lee Stallard, Howard Schulz, CEO of Starbucks, had a legendary ability to connect to his people. He was able to connect at the heart level; including “ways that produce the character strengths of love, kindness, compassion, gentleness and empathy. A leader whose character is missing these strengths may have power over others, but will never lead from influence that moves people to give their best efforts and align their behavior with the leader’s goals. This truth is expressed in sayings such as you have to “earn the right to be heard” and “people don’t care what you know until they know that you care.”
“Research has shown that 75 percent of employees in America today are not engaged at work. They show up for the paycheck but don’t give their best efforts. Part of this is because they don’t feel connected to their leaders. From where they sit, their leaders appear heartless and could care less about them. That’s why cultivating the hearts of leaders is especially important to getting America back on the right track.”
How do leaders accomplish this when there is so much more to do in a day than there is time to do it?
For connection to be effective it can’t be feigned or faked.
We know when someone pretends to care about what we think and feel. A recent Harvard Business Review post by Scott Edinger cites three key ways leaders can create connection:
1. Giving people your undivided attention,
2. Be aware that your emotions are contagious, and
3. Develop your sense of extraversion by developing the ability to reach out and engage with others.
Although I think these are valid ways for leaders to create connection, I think there is something equally important yet often ignored. I believe the way to create connection with others rests with our ability to connect within ourselves. Leaders are responsible for awareness of their internal states of mind, as well as emotion and mood. "People will forget what you said to them, but they will never forget how you made them feel."
Leaders should aim to develop their capacity for self-awareness.
Learn to identify your internal states. Consider meditation and writing as two possible avenues for exploration. Explore areas where your connections feel easy and natural; invite curiosity about areas where your connections are strained and arduous.
Awareness is the first step towards being able to see where your connections are working and where they are not. Commit to consciously working on just one connection by starting with yourself.
Connection within precedes connection outside.
Susan S. Freeman, MBA, ACC, NCC
Executive Success Strategist
Author and Speaker
Founder, Step Up Leader http://www.stepupleader.com
Susan Freeman is author of the new book, “Step Up Now: 21 Powerful Principles for People Who Influence Others,” and the Founder of Step Up Leader. She is an experienced and respected Executive Success Strategist whose passion is helping entrepreneurial leaders go from “stuck” to “unstuck.” She has created a unique system that helps people access their emotional intelligence so they can lead powerfully and authentically. Susan has helped clients in diverse industries and roles obtain passion, clarity, and exceptional results.
She received her B.A. in Psychology from Wellesley College and her M.B.A. in Marketing from Columbia University in New York. She brings to her clients more than 25 years of strategic marketing, non-profit, and retained executive search experience in London and New York. She received her coach training and certification from The Newfield Network. Susan is an accredited coach with the International Coach Federation, as well as an MSP-certified business facilitator.
Susan is a native of Kansas City and resides in Tampa, FL. She is an active member of The Athena Society and a Leadership Tampa Alumna. Committed to education, Susan has served on several educational boards at the secondary and university level. Her global passion is developing young women entrepreneurial leaders in Rwanda, where she is currently involved with The Akilah Institute, a school that empowers young women with the skills, knowledge, and confidence to become leaders.