Self-esteem is one of the natural things that we all have been blessed with since birth. A tiny baby cannot do anything for her, hence can cry, drink, blink, observes, and can feel emotions. Although the intensity of the emotions are not very much visible, but they are present even at the time of birth. We all know when babies think they know everything even the things that are obviously beyond their capacity. They cannot speak a word properly and say they can speak well. They cannot write a single alphabet, but think they are writing a story or so.
The pattern remains the same throughout our life span. When we enter puberty, we act like masters and commanders. We never start thinking on weak lines unless we are taught so. We always think ourselves a complete, well knowledgeable and well-equipped human being. We never surrender. Even when we are hurt, our defense mechanism saves us and we blame others for our problems. We think we are right and we strive for our right cause (even if it is wrong in the eyes of others).
When we enter adulthood, we remain the same – the same esteemed person-the same honorable and respectful personality in our eyes. We are proud of our accomplishments and successes so far and we think we can decide better than our elders can. We think we know all Just like we have been thinking in our each stage of life from birth until adulthood.
Then, in our old age, we again think we know all as we have passed many years to conclude this or that. However, we never think that we have been thinking on the same lines, in exactly the same way, in our each stage of life. In fact, we never think that we know nothing or we lack something in terms of judgment, intelligence, in any conduct or with any reference. We think we are just perfect.
After all, we are perfect human being. There is no doubt in that. When we start believing that, we lack something, the problem starts to emerge-the problem of low self-esteem. When we encounter thoughts that make us feel low in some ability, deed, possession, status, or in any phenomenon, we feel trapped. Our self-esteem is injured and we need a medicine to improve.
Then comes the part of the psychologist. When someone, a friend, a psychologist or a counselor tries to put us back on line, we are relieved. Some matters of self-esteem are more dangerous to others. Therefore, it is very important to investigate them right on time. Otherwise, any delay in these matters would cost us a heavy price. As concepts build on other concepts and the more our concepts are stronger, the more it would be difficult to interfere with them.
To conclude, leaving low self esteem unsolvable for a long time , will cause you lots of sufferings in life like relationship problems, social anxiety, stress and depression, insomnia, anorexia and nervosa and many other psychological disorders (almost all). Therefore, it is vital to act on time wisely in the matters of self-esteem.
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Mona Aeysha, PhD, is an Educational and Developmental Psychologist, have been working as a Teacher, Counselor and Researcher in several institutes of China, Pakistan and Cambodia. Her major areas of interest are: self –esteem, self-concept, conceptual psychology, belief psychology, self psychology, preferential psychology, cultural psychology and women psychology.
You are always welcome to contact her via email if you have any query in this regard.
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Dr Mona