How many times have you said the following to yourself? “When I get I new job, then I will be happy.” “When I meet the right person, then I will be happy.” Or “As soon as I pay off my credit cards, then I will be happy.” It seems as if many of us are always looking to the future, as if it holds the key to our happiness. I know this because I used to do this, a lot! But lately, I have been changing my perspective on what happiness means to me.
I believe that happiness is a choice. We can either complain about what we don’t have, or we can choose to be happy with what we do have. Sometimes we are so focused on what we would like to have in our future, that we forget to see what goodness is in our lives now. I am not saying don’t dream about the future or to ignore your problems, but I do feel there is always something, no matter how small it may seem, to be thankful for right here, right now.
Lately I have been taking a few minutes in the morning, before I get out of bed, to meditate on what I am thankful for in my life. I also like to thank God for the blessings He has in store for me that day and I often ask how I can be a blessing to others. This helps me set up my day in a more positive way. Then in the evening, I try to take the time to find things I appreciated about the day. Some days it is harder to do this then others, but I have found there is always something to be thankful for, even if it is something small.
I have also learned that I can’t control what others may do or say to me, but I can choose how I react. I once heard a person say that when someone speaks to you, no matter how kind or cruel their words are, it is always a reflection on who they are as a person and how they are feeling at that time. I thought this statement was very interesting and it has helped me not to take things as personally as I used to. It has also helped me develop a sense of compassion towards others, as opposed to anger.
Life can be difficult, and I am certainly not trying to trivialize the problems that many people have. However I have found that when I focus on the goodness in my life and I show appreciation towards what is going well, it brings a sense of peace. And as I feel more peace, it seems as if even more things show up to be thankful for. My hope is that everyone reading this will begin to notice what is going well in their lives today. Don’t wait for tomorrow to be happy, choose to be happy now.
Debbie Crawford is an educator and has recently written a short story titled "Pennies From Dad." The book describes the events of her father's death (and afterwards) and how she continues to heal from her loss.