How to change your attitude towards ...?

If you cannot influence the situation, change your attitude towards it. We all know about this. But HOW can you change your attitude towards something? It turns out that this is not so difficult if you understand the very mechanism of the formation of our attitude to reality.

WHAT IS "ATTITUDE"?

To learn how to manage the course of the process, you need to understand its essence. Let's give a precise definition of the phenomenon of attitude and trace the process of its formation.

Attitude in psychology is your reaction to an object in accordance with your past experience (i.e. expectation).

Let's take an example.

There is a person who is unpleasant to you. He may be unpleasant for you for two reasons:

1. You have a negative experience with this person.
2. The person himself is not familiar to you, but he evokes unpleasant associations.

And in fact, and in another case, we are talking about YOUR negative experience. You carry this experience with you and look at the world through its prism. It encourages you to wait for a kick more often than a carrot, because this is the strategy that is beneficial from the point of view of survival. But today it is no longer so relevant and clearly reduces the quality of our life.

But what to do? You have to learn how to deal with the experience you get.

WHERE IS OUR EXPERIENCE HIDDEN?

Everything that has ever happened to us is stored in our memory. The memory of the past determines the nature of interaction with the present. We all build our interaction with the present based on established habits. Their totality is called personality.

It is important to understand that you are not only your personality. Your personality is a set of behavioral programs determined by genetics, upbringing and the influence of the environment as a whole. But there is also will. Will is a trans personal psychic phenomenon. With its help, we can purposefully "mold" our personality, changing our habits within certain limits.

By realizing this, we understand that PEOPLE CAN CHANGE THEMSELVES. Another thing is that they very rarely want to change.

All the experience we acquire is stored in the archives of the unconscious and manifests itself through personal reactions. And the will can control these reactions. Thus, we are not slaves to our experience. We can well learn to work with him in order to consciously change our attitude to reality.

CHANGING ATTITUDES

And now we got to the specific details. Let's again remember the person we don't like. You look at him (albeit in your imagination), but ... you see not him, but your attitude towards him.

Now pause and read thoughtfully again:

WHEN WE LOOK AT THE WORLD, WE SEE NOT THE WORLD ITSELF, BUT OUR ATTITUDE TO IT.

The reason for this attitude is in ourselves. Namely - in personal negative experience. Weak people have negative experiences. We know about this. The weak lose and, over time, get used to losing. The strong win and, over time, get used to winning. The increased tension that we feel in ourselves when we come into contact with something unpleasant is the reaction of our "victim" to a potentially dangerous situation. This reaction is her cry, her warning. And if we realize this reaction as unjustified, then we may well force the victim to remain silent. Especially if she opens her mouth too often.

How to do it? It's very easy to do.

YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE TOWARDS YOURSELF.

You need to see a strong person in yourself. Hunter. Feed him with your attention. Attention is the energy that can feed either the victim or the hunter.

Consider that the way we look at ourselves is also a habit of perception. We are not what we used to see ourselves as. We can be very different. But what we will be exactly now - determines our attitude towards ourselves.

Hence the conclusion:

IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE TOWARDS ANYTHING, CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE TOWARDS YOURSELF.