For a number of years, I have been told resentments will tear me apart if I don’t deal with them. I was told, and it remains true today, that resentments are like a tenant in an apartment building who occupy space but pay no rent. The space in my head is at a premium, and I need it to be occupied gainfully. I can’t afford freeloaders.
“It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal. For when harbouring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die.”© 2001, AAWS, Inc., Alcoholics Anonymous, page 66
I draw much of my strength from things learned from the 12 steps as written in the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous. PLEASE BE AWARE that while the publication was written for those with problems with alcohol, the principals of the steps have long be recognised as a model for any human being to live a healthy life mentally. Forget the word alcohol as written above UNLESS it applies to you. Resentments are a grave malady for all human beings if allowed to live on in the head, and are not dealt with.
I have found that in dealing with my own past, as much as I did not think I was carrying them, I had some deep seeded resentment that I really had to dig out, and I had carried them below the surface for decades. They truly did shut me out from appreciating the full sunshine of life.
While along way from perfect even today, I became aware of the resentments I was carrying through work directed by others, and following the guides of the steps. To the best of my ability, I have dealt with long standing resentments, and in doing so, have been able to grow spiritually and grow as a person.
My journey to a better life came because of an inner feeling that there was a better life available.
Along the journey, I have faced some real issues, including addictions to substance and behaviours. Identifying and dealing with resentments played a huge role in the recovery of a life that has hope and serenity as key elements on a daily basis.
Perfect? No. Improved? Yes.
Are resentments occupying valuable space in your head and not paying rent? Are resentments keeping you from living the life you desire and deserve?
You do have a choice and freedom is available to those who are prepared to change.
Addictions recovery Coach, Life Coach