Getting Off the Treadmill and Getting On with Life

I’ve been wondering why so many of us are so busy; after all, we’re not being forced to labor against our will. What gives?

I hate to put the blame directly on the busy person, but I believe that we are too busy because we choose to be. We like to think that it’s the boss who is piling on all the work or some looming project that fills our hours, but is it really some elusive bad guy, or are we willing participants?

One night, while working alone in a hospital blood bank, I was overwhelmed by horrendous accidents coming into the Emergency Room at the same time that a hemophiliac was having a bleeding crisis and an emergency C-section began in Labor and Delivery. While I chose to work in an intense environment, I didn’t choose to be overwhelmed. If such events happened every night and if I continued to work that shift alone, I was the one choosing a chaotic, crisis-driven world. Eventually, I said, “No more!” and chose a less stressful career. When the unusual becomes usual, the responsibility for being overcommitted falls on the person who chooses to be part of the process.

How Do You Know When You Are Too Busy?

If you can’t tell from the feelings of stress (anxiety, sleeplessness, a nagging sense of never being able to do it all), you might get signals from your family and colleagues. Are you constantly late? Do you miss your kids’ activities so often that they don’t even ask you anymore? Does your spouse complain? Are your coworkers or your boss irritable with you? Has your blood pressure crept up? Do you sleep badly and awaken still tired? Are you on the treadmill because you choose to be there?

Why Do People Choose to Be Too Busy?

It may be because they don’t set good boundaries—people keep giving them stuff to do, and they keep doing it. In that case they are choosing not to say no. Being busy is a choice.

Another reason people get overly busy is because they need approval. They are hoping that just one more perfect report or fabulous design will get them the recognition that they long for. Again, this is a condition that they choose to be in, even if it is an unconscious choice.

What’s a Busy Person to Do?

Sometimes, people can change their lives when they notice that they are too busy; however, often the epiphany involves some personal tipping point, where they realize that their busy-ness is keeping them from enjoying life. A relationship suffers, a career explodes, or health issues crop up. Whether the messenger is gentle or brutal, the first step to stop being too busy is to decide not to be busy.

For some people, that’s all that’s required—just deciding. For them, setting boundaries is easy once the decision is made. For others the process may need to go deeper. If the reason someone is too busy is because he or she is desperately seeking acknowledgement, the road to complete success will involve soul searching to discover the source of that feeling. This can be a long and sometimes painful journey, or it can be one filled with delightful discoveries involving courage and honesty. Again, it’s a choice of how to view one’s life.

What Simple Activities Reduce Stress
and Allow You to Discover the Best Course of Action?

The short answer is breathing. Simple. Easy to do. Taking conscious breaths can calm you so that you have more clarity and are in better touch with what has heart and meaning for you.

How about doing that right now? Take a deep breath, and when you let it out, relax your shoulders and let go of thinking about what you were doing. Now that you have the idea, do it again. And now, one more time.

“Take three deep breaths” is something I often suggest to my coaching clients, friends, family—even to my dogs. Breathing is a common starting point for exercises in workshops and trainings about Personal Development and development. Taking three breaths frequently can change your day; it can even change the way your life goes. A deep breath, taken consciously, can be the best stress reliever you own.

Set Aside Some Time for Yourself

This is best done first thing in the morning.

* Begin your time for yourself by thinking of three things from the previous day that you appreciate. These might include that you found a great parking space during a downpour or that you just landed a publisher for your book. Some days, it’s a struggle to think of anything. When that happens to me, I use a fallback option like “birds at the feeder” or “dogs at my side.” Don’t skip this step! It’s very important.

* Once you’ve noted what you appreciate, allot time to sit quietly. I suggest beginning with three minutes and increasing it later to 15 or 20. Don’t hum or plan or knit, just sit quietly—breathing. Be aware of your breath going in and out. During this time you might encounter two things: mind chatter and the fidgets. Just notice whatever is going on and go back to being aware of your breathing. Ultimately, sitting quietly allows you to hear your inner wisdom.
-*- Set a timer so that you are not constantly looking at the clock.
-*- Sit in any position you want—no need for special pillows or postures. No need for incense, sacred music, finger positions, or special breathing techniques. Sit any way you feel comfortable.
-*- Just sit and listen.

A colleague was doing this program, and his first awareness was that he had been so busy, he hadn’t realized how dissatisfied he was with his life—he was having trouble thinking of anything he could appreciate. Within a few weeks of starting this reflective routine he decided to act on something he had been intending to do for years: he signed up to teach reading to illiterate adults. This became such a satisfying endeavor that now he is thinking of leaving his mind-numbing office job and becoming a teacher.

That’s the secret for getting off the treadmill: appreciate what’s in your life and breathe. Decide not to be busy, and then give yourself the time and space to hear your heart’s desire. That will give you the reason to make the changes you need to make. There’s far more to discover than you might imagine!

** This article is one of 101 great articles that were published in 101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life. To get complete details on “101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life”, visit http://www.selfgrowth.com/greatways.html