Many women who experience vaginismus feel alone, embarrassed, ashamed. Vaginismus is actually quite common. As a counsellor and hypnotherapist with over 6 years experience I have worked with many women to help them to overcome vaginismus.
Vaginismus is tightness in the vagina causing discomfort, burning, pain, penetration problems, or complete inability to have sexual intercourse.
There may be many reasons why women experience vaginismus such as painful sexual experience, anxiety and fear of pain, beliefs that sex is wrong or dirty, ashamed of their sexual feelings or disconnected from their body. There are some medical conditions which can cause painful sex and vaginismus so it's important to be checked out by a doctor to rule these out.
TALK TO YOUR PARTNER
It's important to keep the lines of communication open. Tell him how you feel and listen to how he feels, as this is not just your problem, it's a couples problem.
If you are single, speak to a trusted friend, therapist or keep a journal to express how you feel.
THERAPY AND HYPNOTHERAPY FOR VAGINISMUS
Perhaps you may wish to embark on therapy to help you through the process. There are many different therapists out there so ensure you work with someone who you feel comfortable with and talking about sex, your body and relationships.
Hypnotherapy combined with counselling is a great approach as hypnosis helps to get to the underlying issues much quicker than traditional talking therapy and giving you tools and skills to overcome vaginismus.
A trained therapist will help you to:
* Understand how your thoughts impact your body and how to create new positive thoughts
* Create new associations your body sexually
* Help you to overcome and heal any childhood issues/traumas you may have experienced which may be impacting you sexually
* Resolved any ideas beliefs and concepts about sex which are causing you fear and anxiety.
* Give you homework and tasks to perform at home either individually or with your partner.
CELEBRATE SUCCESS
Celebrate each achievement and success, feel empowered by them as you continue to take a step towards reaching a fulfilled and happy sex life.
BE INIMATE WITH YOUR PARTNER
Because sex may be painful or you are not able to have sex doesn't mean intimacy needs to stop. There are other ways to be intimate with each other sexually without having sexual intercourse. Massage, stroking and touching each other are wonderful ways to connect with each other.
RELAXATION AND BREATHING EXERCISES
Learning how to relax your body is an important tool to have especially relating to sex as if you are scared, anxious you body will immediately become tense especially your vagina. An experienced therapist will be able to teach you breathing and relaxation exercises. Practising yoga and meditation are both wonderful ways for you to relax and connect with your body.
NEXT STEP
You have a right and you deserve to experience a loving, healthy and natural sex life. You do not need to suffer alone, there is help available to help you to overcome vaginismus. Speak to your partner, Dr, and find a suitable therapist to work with you.
Linda is a Hypnotherapist in London specialising in helping men and women overcome sexual issues.
I have helped many womenovercome vaginismus with hypnosis to experience sex at their greatest potential.