What Defines Your Confidence? / Online Marketing

What Defines Your Confidence? / Online Marketing

In today’s hectic paced society, humans make a mental impression (like – dislike) of the other person on a first meeting within 7 seconds. It does not take long for these mental gymnastics to happen, as it has been happening this way for eons of time. The human brain is hardwired in this way as a prehistoric survival mechanism.

First impressions are more heavily influenced by nonverbal cues than verbal cues. A key reason for this perspective is that even as we walk up to each other, our minds are already calculating the outcome. “Do I like him or her from what I can see?” This happens at light speed within the brain and its network of synapses and unconsciously. We don’t have to do any thinking, as the brain’s warehouses of information are quickly sorted to answer the earlier question. The computation taking place while receiving visual and tactile cues on the conscious level is mostly subconscious and driven by the attitude and personality of the person.

Here are some online business ideas and self empowerment information that can help you tap into becoming a more confident person. Confidence is exemplified by outward as well as internal behavior. It is easily acknowledged and accepted as a trait that most people want, as it showcases a person that can handle the job, the position, and the leadership that seems to follow it.

Confident people listen more than they speak. In working with professional sales people over the past thirty some years I have observed that the best ones seldom spoke beyond the initial lead up to asking questions. Their questions were always open ended and intended to be thought provoking for the other party. This allowed the “buyer” to do most of the speaking and in turn consistently gave the “seller” as much information as he needed to allow the buyer to sell themselves as the conversation went on.

Truly confident people are quiet and unassuming. They already know what they think; they want to know what you think. Their mind map has been built from whatever timeline started them on the road to their state of internal confidence in which they live in. I always make the point that we all landed here naked to the world and a blank slate, with the exception of the only two fears humans are born with, the fear of falling and the fear of loud noises. Everything else we are today, has been learned over the span of your lifetime or as I call it our Road of Life.

So confident people ask open-ended questions that give other people the freedom to be thoughtful and introspective. They ask questions such as: “What do you do, How you do it, What do you like about it, What did you learn from it… and What would you do if you found yourself in a similar situation?”

Confident people realize they know a lot, but they wish they knew more… and they know the only way to learn more is to listen more.

Confident people are not spotlight driven, allowing the spotlight to shine on others. If there is no need to prove oneself, life circumstances allow you to position others first and in the process receive information from them that may be useful to your life. Confidence breeds positive forward movement and is contagious to others. Confident people are accepted for upward mobility and tend to land the higher level slots in their career path. They do not allow obstacles to get in their way and find ways around them. You will see them as group, team and company leaders, as people naturally want to follow a strong confident personality.

Confident people don’t need the grandstanding, they know what they’ve achieved and it is presented as a positive internal feeling with strong, positive body communication. They don’t need the validation of others, because validation comes from within the person and is set by the background and life experience on their road of life.

Confident people are not afraid to take a stand as they are not fearful of being wrong. They are the complete opposite of loud, belligerent and conceited people that tend to position their thoughts on the world as the only way to think. These people know they are right – and they almost demand you to know it as well. Their behavior is not founded in confidence, although they want you to see them in that light. Truly confident people don’t mind being proven wrong. They can weather the storm internally and come out on the other end as nothing had ever happened. This consistent show of a great attitude, a positive mind set, and an outgoing personality is their advantage in group settings, setting them apart from the body of the group and in the process creating leadership.

Confident people are willing to ask others for help. The natural tendency is to feel that asking for help is exposing a sign of weakness that may open the door to failure in some respect. Confident people are secure enough within their own skin to admit weakness, as this gives them an opportunity to expand their horizons. They know that their request for help is not tied to a lack of knowledge, skill sets, or life experience.

By opening themselves up, confident people allow more information into their data banks which adds to their personal power. We have all heard the time tested catch phrase “Knowledge is Power”, which we know to be true and a catalyst for further growth.

Confident people are not concerned about what others think of them as they are secure within themselves. In fact when they do ask for help, it creates a very positive exchange as it positions the other person higher in stature at the given moment. This allows open pathways in communication and an exchange of information that will benefit both parties in the equation.

Confident people do not put others down. They are about edifying people, as they know that in order to have solid communication with the other person; it has to be an equal exchange. By putting people in the role of the victim, the end result of the communication will not be as healthy and positive as it should have been.

It is interesting to me in observing people, who like to gossip and like to speak negatively of others; that do so because they like to present themselves as looking better than the people they are speaking about.

Confidence is about being the best person you can be today with the expectation that tomorrow will be even better than today.

Confident people do make mistakes. By allowing letting their guard down and allow the situation to move organically, sometimes producing less than stellar results, confident people are willing to take a chance on the outcome. Depending on the earliest training and guidance supporting decision making, sometimes the situation and its circumstances organically move into less than expected results. This result might be contrary to what the expectation was and needs to be acknowledged as a deviance from the norm. By accepting responsibility for the bad call, the leadership position of the confident person is actually bolstered in the process.

Confidence breeds sincerity and honesty, while insecurity will not allow the real person to show up. Insecurity is a defense set up early on in a person’s training and life experience. That is a key reason why confident people are open to admit their mistakes. When you are truly confident, you are open to letting the situation dictate its own terms and in the process they do not mind looking bad, knowing that this is an exception to the rule.

Confident people’s mindset is more focused. Confident people are on cruise control as their mindset has come to feel that they have brought themselves to a level that surpasses others in achievement and opportunity to move forward on their terms. Most people feel they have to wait their turn that others are more educated, that they are not good enough in being promoted to higher levels of responsibility, hired for the “perfect” job, selected for inclusion into select groups, or chosen for advancement. Confidence breeds a mindset that allows access to whatever is needed in support of what the universe has in store for us.

Confident people know they have the mindset to attract funding for their start up, are able to create their own products, create their relationships through networking, and typically choose their own path in life and on their road of life.

Confident people are not afraid to stand out in a crowd. They know by their internal thinking and feeling that they are on the right track and do offer more than their peer group. I guess a good example of a truly confident person are the many “streakers” that seem to pop up at commercial sporting events every now and then. It takes confidence to parade around large crowds in your birthday suit. When confidence is at the core of your being, you don’t mind situations where you aren't at your best.

Confident people do not seek approval from everyone. They know and feel who their support group is and cater to them almost exclusively. In today’s society we are sometimes measured by our social media following, which in reality means nothing, as it is very easy to set up
countless “friends” that have never been met and only exist in the virtual world. Confidence breeds leadership and most people are content to follow someone else.

A confident person knows that they are the center of their universe and their choice of people at that core level are the ones that will help project them forward to loftier goals and objectives. It is not about the number of social contacts, but rather the quality of these selected members. In other words, it is not about Quantity, it is about Quality that matters most in the selection of people closest to you. It is easy to classify everyone on your social lists as friends, but we both know that in life, you can probably count true friends on one hand. These are people that have many bridges to each other’s worlds and have traversed life’s path in some synchronicity with yours.

Once we have earned our true friends’ trust and respect, no matter where we go or what we do, these are the people who truly matter the most and truly support our life path.

James Hobart, an industry leader in the Professional Beauty Industry for more than 40 years at every level, has certification in hypnotherapy. His insight and experience have helped many companies and individuals with their growth and development over the years. His book, Happiness Is Your Birthright, supports his philosophy on life and is a practical handbook to create positive change throughout one’s life.