Introduction
When you hear the word “anatomy”, what do you think about? Do you think of the body and what you actually see? How it’s made up, the structures, what’s there? Sometimes even with visible anatomy, if someone has an illness or sickness, they may have to go in for an X-ray or an MRI and dig a little deeper to determine what is wrong. We’re going to dig down deep into the anatomy of success and failure because success and failure are exactly the same. They’re simply results. In the Greek, the word “anatomy” means ‘cutting up – to cut up’. So, we are going to cut up what is deep inside of success and failure.
Most of you reading this book are entrepreneurs and business owners. In my book, 177 Motivational Success Quotes to Live the Championship Life, the very first quote has nothing to do with money. It’s lifestyle freedom. It’s the ability to do what you want to do, when you want to do it with whoever you want to do it with as long as you like to do it. That’s called freedom and freedom is either success or you’re not free because you start to live in failure. As an entrepreneur and business owner it’s very important to recognize that point.
When I asked you the question about what you think of when I say the word ‘anatomy’, you probably thought of the body. You think of the finished product. You think of an adult. In the doctor’s office, they usually have the little skeleton there which is the anatomy of the body. Keep a mental picture of that skeleton that is sitting in the doctor’s office. The anatomy of success and failure is really parallel with the physical world, the mental world, the emotional world because without a vertebra, your body would have a problem. You would have a major issue without blood. There are 111 bones in one foot alone. But if one is broken a little bit, you’re limping.
A lot of times in life, failures are limping and eventually the limp becomes a lifestyle and then you accept the failure. As we dig down deep into success, you really must understand and accept that you have to take responsibility, either for your success or for your failure.
For the last 12 years, I’ve seen people come out to events and be fired up and excited. And then I’ve seen them quit. They get to one of the steps required for success and all of a sudden they think, “No, I can’t do that.” They reject it and then they make an excuse and they quit. No one has ever come back to me in five years and said, “John, I did the complete opposite of what you strategically coached me on and I’m successful.”
Here’s a homework assignment for you before you go any further in this book. I want you to write, “Coach Di Lemme, I’m committed to the five-year process! Today’s date is (fill in the date), and I will stand strong for the next five years. I am fully committed to my success!” Now here’s what I want you to do. I want you to e-mail it to John@LifestyleFreedomClub.com and print one out for yourself.
Put your commitment in front of you so that you see it every day, because there will be a day that you are pushed to choose between success and failure. It’s a continuous reminder of what you are fighting for in life. It will remind you to choose success no matter what you face. If you choose failure, then rip up your commitment with a full understanding that you have given up on success and your ability to achieve it.
It’s very important to have clarity and have a sense of accomplishment in front of you. This is the foundation. It’s like having your birth certificate in front of you. When you keep this in front of you, it will eventually get inside you and you will realize that at one time, you were born a Champion with the absolute right to be a success.
We were all children at one time. Notice the process from birth to five years old. It’s a growth process for the human body. Similarly, there’s a success process. That’s very important to know, because of the five year commitment that you’ve printed out and hung in front of you. When you choose to follow all of the strategies that I’m going to review in depth in this book, success is going to happen. It’s inevitable for you not to grow in the success process just like it’s nearly impossible for a healthy human body not to grow if it’s being feed and nourished in its growth process.
Another definition of anatomy is a detailed analysis. Now, let’s take it a little further. To analyze something means that you are breaking it down into essential elements. For example, if one essential element is missing from a recipe, it’s not going to taste good, right? It would be like leaving the cheese out of the macaroni and cheese. It changes the entire recipe, because it’s missing an essential element.
Unfortunately, most people’s lives are missing the essential elements that make up success. They aren’t willing to take the extra steps needed so that they achieve the level of success that they’ve always dreamed of. They keep trying to take shortcuts in the success process.
Have you ever heard someone say, “Well, you don’t know me. I am stuck in my ways.” Let me tell you about ‘My Way’. It’s a Frank Sinatra song but it’s also an excuse. People say, “I’m stuck in my own way,” which means they are in their own way and can’t move forward. It’s an excuse!
I’m going to give you seven essential elements for success and if you are willing to step aside from doing things your way, then you will progress towards your Why in the success process and fully understand the anatomy of success and failure. But it all comes down to your commitment. Now, let’s get started.

Essential Element #1: Make the Decision to Succeed

You make the decision that you want to succeed. That’s it! It’s simply a decision. I went to a business event at the Rye Town Hilton, on March 15, 1990, and I made a decision that night to succeed. I made a decision to become a highly successful entrepreneur. On my way home, I was fired up about my future! I called my best friend to share my excitement. The first thing he said to me was “Stay away from those people. That’s not real.” He was my closest friend! He said, “That’s not going to work. That’s just not real.” I made a decision to succeed that night, but I could have allowed him to change my mind.
He could have made a decision for me to fail, but I stood up for my dream and made a decision to succeed. Similarly, everyone that has failed in life, made a decision in some way or another to fail. They made a decision to give up, to quit, to just say, “It’s not for me. You don’t know where I come from.” or “That’s too good to be true.”
Now, let me clarify something. I’m not talking about taking a risk and failing at something. We’ve all done that and it’s an important part of our success journey. I’m referring to the type of failure that is decision based and stops you from achieving the level of success that you deserve. That’s why the first Essential Element is so important. You have to make a rock-solid decision to succeed or you will instantly make a decision to fail. It is incredibly powerful!

Essential Element #2: Be Willing

There are two main areas in success that people have a challenge with – willingness to learn and willingness to listen. One of my daily habits is I make sure that I’m willing to listen and I’m willing to learn. Yes, every single day!
Some of my greatest learning experiences have come from listening to and watching people that have made the decision to fail. No, I don’t recommend that you commit to do this daily, but it’s an interesting process for me as a Strategic Millionaire Business Coach. Let me explain.
Failure is success going backwards. People that choose failure over success take the same yet opposite actions of a champion that has made a decision to succeed. They build their own mastermind team (negative associations instead of positive); they immerse themselves in books, CDs, DVDs, TV and other forms of media (all negative news and information); and they have daily
habits that they engage in every single day (negative habits that drive them further from their dream). Failure is the flip side of everything that you are willing to do as a champion that made the decision to succeed.
Now, I know you’re saying, “John, what does that have to do with me and my willingness? I’m not like those people.” Let me put it to you straight. Yes, you are if you don’t make the decision to be willing to listen and learn every single day, even if it’s something you don’t want to hear. Ahh…I got your attention on that one!
I guarantee that you will have record breaking results when you start listening to and learning from the things that you don’t want to hear. Deep down inside you know that you need to hear them and need to change. You have to drop the ego and be willing to grow outside of your comfort zone. Now, that’s what I call being willing to listen and learn.
Everyone has that one special event in life that gives them a huge opportunity to listen and learn to the point that it changes their life completely. For me, it was overcoming my stuttering disability. I went to grammar school in Yonkers, New York. I still remember walking down Tuckahoe Road on my way to school getting lost in my thoughts and questioning God as to why I couldn’t talk without stuttering. What I didn’t know was that God had a plan for my life and used stuttering to drive me towards that plan.
As a stutterer, I was forced to listen and learn more than the average child. I honed those skills to excel in speaking and communication, which has led me to be one of the most sought after motivational speakers in the world. But it wasn’t my choice. I was forced to listen and learn by my adversity.
Everyone has been through something in life that made them ask the question, “Why me?” In order to fully understand why you are going through something in your life, you must be willing to listen and learn just like I did with my stuttering or you may miss the opportunity that lies deep within your adversity. I don’t believe that anything happens by coincidence, not even the problems that we face, so make sure that you are always willing to close your mouth, open your ears and learn despite your feelings about the actual situation.

Essential Element #3: Appreciate Your Struggle

Appreciating your struggle isn’t always easy, especially when you are usually fighting to get out of the situation that is causing the struggle. One of my favorite definitions of struggle is to advance with violent effort.
Imagine a butterfly fighting to shed its cocoon. Without the cocoon, the caterpillar would never go through the season to turn into a beautiful butterfly. As the butterfly fights its way out of the cocoon, its wings grow stronger and stronger so that it can fly free from captivity. However, when most people see a butterfly, they appreciate its beauty and are not even remotely aware of the struggle that it had to go through to become such an amazing creature.
Similarly, success is always hidden by challenges and problems. In solving them, you acquire the skills that you need to excel in every area of your life and achieve your ultimate Why. Sadly, many of us are not willing to struggle to shed the cocoon that is holding us captive. We get comfortable in the cocoon, which leads to the failure to move forward and reach the next level of success.
Many people are struggling right now in business because they are simply not focused. Instead of facing the struggle and appreciating the strength that they gain from the fight, they whine, moan and complain about it. There’s nothing worse than a whiner that is literally holding opportunity in the palm of their hands, but they won’t pay the price to get it.
Olympic Gold Medalist Nikki Stone is a great personal friend of mine. She broke her back two years prior to winning a gold medal and ten doctors told her she would never walk. They told her one thing that would have made most people quit, but she told herself something different. She made a decision to struggle. Nikki fought through her adversity and won a gold medal.
Fighting is part of the struggle no matter if you like it or not. It’s not pretty and it’s not easy, but it’s part of what you have to do to succeed. What if that butterfly said, “You know what, I’m just going to hang out here in the cocoon a little bit longer. I just want to go back to being a caterpillar, because all this fighting is too much.” That would be impossible, because the caterpillar is gone forever. There’s no turning back! It has to keep going no matter how hard and long the fight might be.
I once heard a man describe trying to help a butterfly get free of its cocoon. He took a knife and cut the cocoon away. The butterfly came out but then died right before his eyes. That butterfly needed to struggle to survive. It simply didn’t have the strength to face the world without the struggle.
We all need to struggle. You have to appreciate it and focus on what’s on the other side of the fight. You will finally be free from captivity! Remember, you can’t speed up the struggle. The fight may be long and hard, but never give up no matter how long it takes to break free from your cocoon.

Author's Bio: 

In September 2001, John Di Lemme founded Di Lemme Development Group, Inc., a company known worldwide for its role in expanding the personal development industry. As President and CEO, John strives for excellence in every area of his business and believes that you must surround yourself with a like-minded team in order to stay on top of your game.

In addition to building a successful company, John has changed lives around the globe as an international motivational speaker that has spoken in over five hundred venues. Over the past thirteen years, he has shared the stage with the best of the best including Rich Devos, Denis Waitley, Jim Rohn, and Les Brown only to name a few. This is truly an amazing feat for someone that was clinically diagnosed as a stutterer at a very young age and told that he would never speak fluently.

John truly believes that everyone needs personal development to reach their full potential in life, and his determination to reach all forms of media with his motivational messages has catapulted his career. John has produced over four hundred fifty products and is an accomplished author of thirteen books including his best-selling book, “47 Secrets of Extreme Customer Service.” As a Strategic Business Coach and Small Business Expert, John’s students include doctors, lawyers, entrepreneurs, consultants, CEOs of million dollar companies, and various other occupations that are thriving in a so-called poor economy. John’s success with his students has made him one of the most highly sought after business coaches in the world.

John’s passion is to teach others how to live a champion life despite the label that society has placed on them. Through his books, audio/video materials, sold-out live seminars, numerous television interviews, intensive training boot camps, weekly tele-classes, Strategic Business Coaching, Closing & Marketing University, Millionaire Affirmation Academy, Small Business Motivational Marketing Daily Tip, and Lifestyle Freedom Club memberships, John has made success a reality for thousands worldwide