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2 Important Things to Keep in Mind If You'Ve Been Dumped for Another Person

Written by Clay Andrews

Topic: Relationship AdvicePublished August 30, 2011
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Have you ever been dumped? If you’re like most people, you probably have (or will be) at some point in life. I’m not saying this to be pessimistic. It’s just a simple matter of fact that if you aren’t married yet, there’s a reasonably good chance that you’ll have to deal with your share of heartbreak.

But it can add an extra sting to have to deal with the agony of being dumped for another person. Add the feelings of inadequacy compared to another person to the feelings of rejection that you are already experiencing and you’ve got a really nasty combination.

Unfortunately, people do get dumped for other people. That’s just how some people cope with relationships. If you’ve been dumped for another person, that probably isn’t much comfort, but here are a few things to keep in mind as you move forward.

First, understand that this says more about your ex than it does about you and your ability to be lovable. Leaving someone for another person is a very disrespectful thing to do. Your ex could have at least given you the courtesy to break up with you when they knew the relationship wasn’t satisfying rather than stringing you along until they found someone else to “replace” you.

I know it can be difficult, but don’t take this personally. It doesn’t meant that you aren’t a lovable person or that you should compare yourself to this new person in your ex’s life. Remember that this decision was ultimately your ex’s, and by most people’s standards, it was a very poor decision on their part.

Secondly, don’t treat their new partner as your competition. This other person likely didn’t steal your partner away from you. In all probability, they may not have even known that your ex was in a relationship when they first met them. Again, this just goes back to your ex’s poor judgement and their inability to end a relationship that isn’t going well for them.

Treat this other person more as an innocent bystander who in all likelihood simply got caught up in your ex’s poor choice. It’s easy to look at them as your enemy, but just as you wouldn’t want them to view you as their enemy, you shouldn’t see them as the cause of your break up. After all, if it wasn’t them, your ex probably would have left you for someone else anyway.

It can be difficult to be dumped for someone else, but take the time to keep the above two points in mind and you’ll be in a much better state of mind to handle your recovery from your break up.

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About the Author

If you'd like to learn more about what you can do if you've been dumped for someone else, please check out the article on my website about being friends with an ex.

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