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4 Things You Need to Think About Before You Decide to Live-In

Written by Ram Gupta

Topic: Relationship AdvicePublished July 25, 2011
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Deciding to live-in with your partner is a major step, and is just as significant as marriage for a lot of couples. It has the potential to make your relationship stronger and happier, or to weaken and eventually destroy it. How well prepared you are mentally, emotionally and financially, and how seriously you take this step, are crucial for success. If you want to make sure that you and your partner end up happier for this step, you need to consider a few things before you take the plunge.

1. Don't Be Casual

This is very important. You may have been made to believe that a live-in relationship is a casual, no-strings attached kind of an arrangement that you can just sail into without thought or worry. That is a very dangerous attitude, especially if you are serious about your partner, and can get you into a lot of trouble. You are best advised to treat this relationship and your partner with a lot of respect, and take this seriously.

2. Plan Your Finances

Money is a crucial factor, and has the power to make or break relationships. Before you move in, have a thorough discussion about how you both plan to handle and invest your resource pool. Ideally, you should both be contributing equally and you should know what kind of a financial commitment you are getting into. Here planning is everything, and you need to know what you can afford and whether your lifestyle will change for the better or the worse. Mismanagement or poor planning will mean that the obligation will pass on to one person more than the other, and this can lead to needless grudges and conflicts.

3. Giving Time to Each Other

Time is the other crucial factor. Since you will no longer be dating and will be 'around' more, without realizing it, you may start spending less quality time with each other. That is not a good thing. Even if it does not matter to you, your partner may notice the change, or vice versa. Either way, it will lead to unhappiness in the relationship. Try to keep your dates alive like you did before. Also, make sure that you share at least one meal together on most days, where you are devoted to each other, and not to your own problems, your phone or the television.

4. Never Take Your Partner For Granted

No matter how much you love each other now, the moment you start taking your partner for granted, you are laying the foundations for a grudge and grief. Naturally, your partner will not mind you watching two TV shows over dinner straightaway, but if it happens long enough, don't expect them to continue being magnanimous. All in all, if you want to sustain a healthy relationship, you need to start taking responsibility for it straightaway. Communicate with each other, respect each other's presence and make time for each other, and there is no reason why this will not be the wonderful adventure you are hoping it becomes.

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