Want to save your marriage and stop divorce? Is it easier said than done? Well, it may feel like that if your marriage has gone through an affair. An affair can shatter a marriage right to the very core in many ways, including destroying the trust. After the trust is gone divorce may be one of the only clear options that you have. But if you really want to make the marriage work, and you are willing to take the action required to fix it then divorce doesn't have to be the only option, or even an option at all.

Even though it seems impossible, a lot of couples end up rebuilding their trust and moving on to a better and happier marriage after an affair. This may be because the affair has alerted them to the problems in their marriage and allowed them to really see how bad it has gotten, and given them a chance to make things better. If you look at the affair as a wake-up call then you may be able to save your marriage as well.

5 Tips to Help Save Your Marriage After an Affair

1. If you are the one who cheated then you have to take responsibility for your actions if you want to save your marriage. You can't go around blaming your partner or the person you had an affair with, and you can't make excuses for the affair. If you ever want to rebuild the trust then you have to admit that you screwed up big time and that you are the only one to blame for it.

2. If you want to save your marriage then you have to communicate with your partner in a way that allows them to feel better. This means answering their questions honestly - no matter how hard they are to answer. If you act shady in any way by trying to withhold information or embellish the story then your partner will sense it and quickly start to lose even more trust in you. But if you are straightforward and honest with your partner then you have a better chance to save your marriage and stop divorce, which is what you want!

3. You have to admit the relationship problems that helped lead you to an affair if you want to save your marriage AND have a better marriage. This doesn't mean that you blame your partner or make excuses, but it does mean that you admit the issues you have been having in the relationship and show desire to fix them. It may be hard to tell your partner what you are not happy with because you don't want to hurt them anymore than you have, but it's essential to be honest and share your concerns if you want to save your marriage. You can't change what you don't acknowledge.

4. Make sure you actions match your words if you want to rebuild the trust in your marriage. Actions speak louder than words, so don't say you are not interested in other people and then flirt with someone who you find attractive. If your partner see's any sign of you being dishonest then you may give them a reason to give up on the marriage and pursue a divorce.

5. Do what you say you will and say what you do. In other words, follow through on your promises no matter how small they are. With the marriage in the tender state it's in, even a small promise broken can cause whatever trust has been built back to be lost again. This could be over something as mundane as not taking out the garbage when you said you would. Any sign that you are lying will set off your partner's alarm and possibly ruin your chances to save your marriage, so make sure that you always follow through with your promises.

Remember these 5 tips when trying to save your marriage and stop divorce after you've had an affair and you will find that rebuilding trust will slowly start to happen in the marriage. It may take a long time to fully get the trust back, but if you really want to save your marriage then the effort you put in will be worth it!

Author's Bio: 

Bellaisa's website, the Relationship Circle, has relationship advice for men and women like how to save your marriage.