It seems that when people talk about first dates, they have so many "helpful tips" on how to behave that once you are actually on the date, you can hardly remember what to do. If you're anything like me, you want to be able to relax and be yourself instead of trying to keep a mental checklist of what to say and what not to say. Well, don't worry; here is a short list of 6 things that you definitely should NOT say on a first date.

1. Are you a Republican or a Democrat?

Try to avoid the topic of politics at all costs. When politics are the topic of conversation, people get so caught up in supporting their political party that they can't think rationally, and all they care about is proving that they are right. Many people don't feel that they can put aside their political differences and co-exist in a romantic relationship like Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver, so on your next first date, skip the politics.

2. How many people have you dated?

Remember that you're supposed to be learning out the person you on the date with, you don't need to hear about their past dates and relationships. For some people, this can actually be a sore subject if they've dated a lot of people, but it can also be a sensitive topic if they've never really dated anyone. So instead of dwelling on the past, focus on the present and enjoy your date.

3. I wonder what our kids would look like...

Ok. If you only remember one thing on this list, remember this one. Do not, under any circumstances bring this up. If your date happens to ask if you want kids, it's alright to answer that question, but don't mention having kids with them. It's your very first date, and if you get too ahead of yourself, your enthusiasm might push the other person in the opposite direction.

4. Don't mention your ex.

I'm sure we all know that person who always finds a way to bring up their ex, no matter what the topic is. Well, don't be that person, especially not on a first date with someone new. If you need to, have "test" conversations with a friend prior to your date, so you can practice not bringing up your ex. It is crucial that you don't spend your entire date talking about your ex.

5. I have a TON of debt.

Many people struggle with being in debt, and in the back of their mind, they know that that marriage means sharing each other's financial past. Since you are only on your first date, don't mention how much debt you have. In many cases, people pay off their debt much more quickly than they think they will, and they never even have to take their debt into their marriage. So, don't stress about your debt, just enjoy your date!

6. I haven't been on a date in YEARS!

While it is ok if you haven't been on a date in years, it is not a good idea to bring this up on the first date. If the person asks you directly, you don't have to lie, but try to say something like, "You know... I've never been on a date to this restaurant," or something along those lines. You could say something like, "I think it's so funny how that's always one of the first questions people ask you on a first date!" The person will hopefully not bring up the question again.

Now that you know what not to say, you may be wondering, "Well....what CAN I say?" Basically, you want to be yourself and don't feel that you have to tell the other person your entire life history on the first date. Once you get to know each other, some of these topics will inevitably come up, but don't bring them up right away.

If you get nervous and you aren't sure what to say, don't feel the need to blurt out something embarrassing just to fill the silence. Remember that it's the first date and both of you are equally nervous, so just take a deep breath and relax! If you accidentally bring up one of the topics on the forbidden list, don't get flustered and apologize a million times. Just play it cool and try to change the subject.

If things are supposed to work out with that person, they will. If they don't work out, that doesn't mean you will never find your dream person. It just means they are working on becoming even dreamier for you.

Author's Bio: 

Terri Smith is a Personal Christian Matchmaker and has been matchmaking in Southern California for over 20 years. She is responsible for putting together over 350 couples in marriage with a ZERO DIVORCE RATE.

Terri (or a member of her team) personally interviews each prospective candidate to ensure suitability.

For your confidential interview, visit her site at