“7 Simple Steps to Learning to Love Yourself”

I had a lady contact me yesterday who lost her son a couple of years ago and she is still grieving and blaming herself even though she had nothing to do with his death. She’s signed up to go to a FREE 10 Day Vipassana Meditation Retreat to let go of all her pent-up emotion and find inner peace. But, inside she still doesn’t love herself. How do we learn to love the one we see in the mirror?

1 - Change your thinking one thought at a time. Whenever a negative thought about yourself comes in to say, “No that is not true”. And then change that thought to a positive thought about yourself. This takes practice, but the more time you spend on changing those thoughts the more you will learn to love yourself.

2 - Practice little acts of kindness daily. One of the best ways to learn to love yourself is to practice little acts of kindness with others. Like walking through the mall and taking a cup of coffee to someone who you don’t know at all and needs a little pick-me-up. Or take a little gift and giving it to someone with a smile on your face. Or just strike up a conversation with someone and tell them how great they look. These little acts of kindness also make you feel good about yourself so you start loving yourself.

3 - Start smiling all the time. This is not easy we have now been taught in society to not smile at all. But if you smile you are actually loving yourself. And a smile changes your brains chemistry to awaken serotonin and dopamine in your brain and your mood is uplifted… this is science.

4 - See in yourself the indwelling existence of that which is perfect and omnipresent. How could you be made in the of that which is all knowing and not have that courage and conviction to be powerful within? You are part of that one greatness at all times.

5 - Allow spirit to move your life forward at all times. Think of yourself as a car and allow the existence of God, the Universe, and the Great Spirit to be the driver. Let go of “I, Me, and Mine” and see yourself as WE.

6 - See in everyone else that same guiding light. They are no different from you, sometimes they allow the great driver of their car to take over and at other times not. See them as greatness and thus you will see the good in all things.

7 - Start telling yourself that you are a good person and mean it. Most of all start practicing telling yourself that you are a good, loving, and kind person and mean it. No one can do this for you, you have to do this for yourself and mean it. See your strengths, see your power, see the good things about yourself and tell yourself about your strengths daily. This is not about boosting or anything like that at all… this is about loving yourself. And start having compassion for others and you will have compassion for yourself.

Many Blessings to Everyone!

Dr. Paul Haider