So many people feel that their lives are fated, that they are running behind their life without ever being able to quite catch up with it. They certainly don´t feel that they can carve out their destiny; instead life, money and time become like an overbearing dictator. In these circumstances life takes on a grey hue of getting through or the burned ochre of frustration, with the sunny hopes of childhood long lost in the mists of time.

Yet it doesn´t have to be that way. There are increasing numbers of people who grab the gauntlet of their destiny and forge the life they truly deserve. It may surprise you to know that it is really simpler than you might have imagined.

This article guides you how with the 7 key steps.

Step 1 – Have a Compelling Vision

Many people think of a vision as a list of material things they would like to acquire. However, a compelling vision goes far beyond this superficial level. A compelling vision is connected to that deep authentic part of yourself that has always been with you. It is compelling because it is driven by a true passion, because it excites you and above all because it gives your life meaning. It is both visual (I encourage everyone to have a vision board with images of their vision) and emotional (it pangs in your gut and heart).

Step 2 – Change your Story

Did you know that we are constantly running a film in our mind of our past and of our future? Most people are running films that essentially keep re-creating the fate that they would like to escape from.

Now because it is just a film it means that you can re-script it. You can choose the past that you want to focus on and your relationship with it. Your vision will give you a clear vision of your future, so you can make the conscious choices in the present that will create this future. So, you are free to enjoy and celebrate the present.

Step 3 – Get Things Done

Learn how to overcome procrastination and begin to just take small actions, every day. Keep it simple. You don´t need to feel you need a huge “to do” list and the energy to match it. Successful people know what makes an average day. Not typical, but average (as in neither exceptionally good nor exceptionally bad). For example as a mum, spending at least half an hour before school and half an hour after school focused 100 per cent on being with the kids. Or as a writer, to actually write for 45 minutes a day. Then this is what they do day-in and day-out.

This means that they have the staying power and patience to keep going for long enough to make their vision a reality. Let´s be honest a vision that generates any degree of passion is going to take time, constancy and patience to bear fruit. That means having the pace of a long-distance runner, a sprinter will simply exhaust themselves long before they get anywhere worth getting.

Step 4 – Build your Life Skills

Research has consistently shown that what differentiates happy and successful people from everyone else are the life skills that they possess. They have a high level of communication and relationship skills, time management skills, they are self-directed and self motivated and they can manage their mind, inner state and emotions. Therefore, knowing your strengths and development areas and having a personal development plan is essential for creating your destiny.

Step 5 – Change your Habits

Your habits are simply the things you do and say on automatic pilot. They usually have some aspect of compulsion to them, meaning that you will feel uncomfortable or even fearful if you do not go through the motions. I have written in more detail on this subject in my previous article, True Synchronicity.

Step 6 – Change your Unconscious Mind

Did you know that 95% of your life is run by your unconscious mind? This means that you want to ensure that this massive power house is driven by beliefs and perspectives that are synchronized with the destiny that you want to create. For instance it needs to simply know that you are powerful beyond words and that you can have a massive influence on your life. It needs to see possibilities when other people see problems and exciting challenges when others are overwhelmed by difficulties.

You might at this point be asking the question, great, but how do I do this. Now I don’t have the space here to answer it, however, our Self-Leadership course takes you through all of these steps in a wholly practical way. In fact the only steps that it doesn´t cover are some of the key life skills, which you can learn them with our other courses.

Step 7 – Understand the Power of your Daily Contemplative Practice

Most people are so busy working in their life that they have no time left to work on their life and so they keep going round in circles. People who create their destiny have realized that by setting aside 20 – 120 minutes a day to renew and reflect they recover this time many times over. Your contemplative time needs to include the following elements:

Physical exercise, that keeps you healthy, strong and flexible and which will boost your energy levels and optimism
A practice such as meditation, that clears and gives you control of your mind
Time and space to review your life and day to take stock of your progress, congratulate yourself, learn from your mistakes and refocus your attention and energy on the day ahead

I certainly feel that I am creating my destiny if I have given you a glimpse that it is possible to transform your life into the story you will love to tell your grandchildren and one that they may even tell many generations to come. It just hinges on taking these simple steps with constancy and over enough time, with patience, as you enjoy each moment of this journey of your life.

Author's Bio: 

SadaNam Kaur is an expert in professional & personal mastery, social & emotional intelligence. A pioneering coach & profesional development consultant, through integrative and accelerated learning.

She has worked in personal development and coaching for over 20 years and has supported thousands of people to take the next step in their lives, through courses, her online programs and 1:1 coaching.

She was one of the first people to develop coaching in the U.K.