A New Year, A New Beginning

Well, here we are. It’s 2009, a new year, at the end of the new month and a new day. Every time I turn, I see commercials for ‘Resolutions’ from going to the gym to dieting. Have you made resolutions for this year? What are you going to ‘try’ to do for 2009? I read a quote by Lester Levenson (founder of The Sedona Method) that read “Trying is wanting approval for something that you have no intention of doing” and it made me think. What resolutions have I ‘tried’ to realize in the past as well as now? How finally did I get to where I am? There’s stress everywhere from the economy to just surviving the daily ‘rat race’ of rushing to work, rushing home and trying to spend time with the family. We stay up as late as we can, wake up early to then repeat the whole cycle again the very next day. There’s a weekly countdown of how soon will Friday get here again. That painful passage of time before the weekend finally gets here. It’s FRIIIDAAAY!!! Can any of you relate?

We tend to feed this existence with things that will help us escape it. We’ll use food, alcohol, dysfunctional relationships or just ‘zone’ out right in front of our TVs. We do what we know and are stuck in this ‘comfort zone’ of ‘habitual’ existence. There’s another quote I ran across that read, “If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.”

Are you tired of living your life this way? It reminds me of that dream of running fervently and you’re not going anywhere. Have you ever had that dream? Awareness is the first step to breaking the cycle. If you don’t know something is broken, how can you fix it? Ask yourself, “What do I want?” The answer I get from my clients all the time is, “I just want to be happy”. What is going to make you happy? Is it money, or is it what money will allow you to do? If you think about it, it is what the money will allow you to do. Whether it’s spend more time with the family or go to the Caribbean, if I were a Genie and gave you either of those things you would not even be THINKING about money. You would then probably have another desire, which after inspection, would not be about the money either.

Now, I mention THINKING. Have you ever heard of a saying that goes, “Be careful what you wish for, you might just get it”? Have you ever noticed what you think about on average? Do you tend to see the glass as ‘half full’ or ‘half empty’? Humans have anywhere from fifty to sixty thousand thoughts a DAY. That’s pretty difficult to monitor. Now I have another question, how do you FEEL? Are you mostly cranky or tired and find yourself just…WANTING? Or do you mostly have a good and happy feeling inside and are grateful for the things you have? It’s either going to FEEL good or bad. Ask yourSELF.

I have another question, have you ever paid attention to the WORDS you use? When you speak to someone or especially yourself, would you say something like, “I should have done this and not that” OR “I could have done this instead of that”? I want you to sit with this for a second. Look at both statements and really put yourself in that place of FEELING whatever it is you ‘should have’ done. Now, say the other statement and sit with how it feels. Do you feel lighter? Better? CHANGING YOUR WORDS has power. Refer to problems in the past tense, and refer to goals in the present tense. If we can realize that we language our lives we can change how we feel and ultimately change our lives just by being aware of the words we choose. Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, either way you are correct”. Think about it, if you don’t believe it, how is anyone else going to? Now let’s continue on this path and I have another question, do you ACCEPT yourself? What do you BELIEVE about yourself? Do you believe you deserve the very things you are wanting? Are you always feeling you are not good enough or thinking ‘it could never happen to me’? If these negative beliefs are strong in you, then how can you create a loving, joyous and prosperous life? Somewhere your subconscious is making sure you do not obtain your goals. It is vital that we release foolish or negative ideas and beliefs that do not support us and nourish us.

Our concepts of ourselves and of life must support us not negate us. If we choose to believe that we are helpless victims and that it is all hopeless, then the universe will support us in that belief and we’ll just go down the drain. Try an exercise and do it for yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I love and approve of myself exactly as I am”. Notice how you feel. Do you find it painful or silly? Do you ever wonder if you’re killing yourself with your own critical thoughts? When we won’t love ourselves it just means that we are still believing the old limitations that someone taught us many years ago. Usually that person was someone who did not know how to make their own life work. Remember your limiting beliefs are only thoughts and thoughts can be changed. Let’s change them now. The only thing you ever have control over is your current thought. Loving ourselves begins with never ever criticizing ourselves for anything. Criticism only locks us into the very pattern we are trying to change. Being gentle with ourselves helps us move out of it. Let’s try approving of yourself and see what happens. Self-approval and self-acceptance right here and right now are the keys to positive changes.

It is also important that we release the past. Be willing to forgive and the universe will take care of the how’s. Sometimes we think that we have to be angry with ourselves in order to change. I used to have a friend that had to yell at the weights and at the gym to get ‘pumped’ and ‘tough’. Anger just locks us deeper into our patterns. Your emotions are energy in motion. Are you feeling good or bad? Use your emotions as the guidance system they were intended to be. Follow your bliss and pay attention to what you are feeling. If you’re feeling bad, chances are you are in a negative thinking pattern. Release the anger and all of the negative beliefs we have about ourselves and about life and begin the process of accepting and approving who and what we are in the here and now. Keep in mind that we are always unfolding in the best way we can.