Beyond Happiness: Exposing The 'Me' Myth
Written by Nouk Sanchez
What do you think you need? If the ‘law of attraction’ worked like a magic wand to create whatever you wanted, what would that be? Is it abundant financial security to last a life-time? Is it to manifest the love of your life? Or perhaps you just want your family or loved ones to be healthy or happy. Maybe you’re one of the few who’s looking for Self-realization or enlightenment. Whatever it is you think will make you happy…won’t. At least not for long; it will make you happy until you get bored with it, or until ‘it’ changes or ends. Then, guess what? The very thing you previously believed would bring happiness will now bring you pain. A romance that seemed perfect may end in a painful break-up. A business venture that began with excitement amounts to exhaustion or bankruptcy. Or a long planned vacation turns out to be a waste of time and money. There’s something very wrong with the ‘happiness formula’ as it stands yet we continue to pursue the same old formula without ever asking perhaps the most revealing question of all, “What is it for?” What is anything or anybody for in our lives? Why do we want what we want? We pursue what we want because we’re searching for happiness!
Taking a deeper look at the intent beneath our desires, we’ll start to see that what we’re really searching for goes beyond the superficial ‘thing’ we think will make us happy. And if we ponder the question a little more on a number of so-called desires, we’ll recognize the answers as all being the same.
Let’s say we want a great relationship. Then if we ask, “What is it for?” We’ll find it’s usually to experience love, approval, validation, connection. They’ll be the core needs associated with the desire for a partner. Other desires such as wealth, prestige, fame and security all stem from the same unconscious need we have for love and connection. Even the negative desires we have including addictions although concealed, all stem from that universal need to feel loved.
Everything you think you want or need, any feelings of lack or scarcity you may have, all emerge from one basic desire; to ‘know’ love. We’re not talking the type of love that can change or end. We mean to be free of that persistent sense of threat that haunts our daily lives in one form or another. To know absolutely that no matter what happens it’s all in our own best interests as well as others; to be permanently free of struggle and sacrifice.
Humanity has pursued happiness and love for eons with no consistent results. You can use the ‘law of attraction’ all you want but it can’t bring lasting contentment. It’s impossible to achieve lasting happiness or love without recognizing and undoing the one inhibitor of lasting joy; the ego. This is the ‘me’ we think we are. The ego is a mental construct that is propelled by fear not love. It’s the part of us that believes in separation convinced that the body is the sum of its identity. The ego’s unconscious motto is ‘seek and never find’.
What we may not realize is that beneath this ‘me’ is an infinite Self, one who is joined with the Universal Inspiration. The true Self once revealed, is the conduit for an earthly experience that far exceeds any previous notion of happiness or love. While the ego lies unquestioned there will be an endless journey of searching for happiness exte
ally in something, somebody or some experience.
Undoing the ego is not about acquiring more knowledge. It’s about unlea
ing all the limiting beliefs we have about ourselves, others and the world. We project our reality. There’s only one Reality and that’s love. There’s only one God Who is love. If God is love and nothing but love then how could there be fear, conflict, disease or death? How could there be something ‘other’ than perfect love…except in a dream? As A Course in Miracles explains, there is nothing but love everywhere all at once and the reason we can’t perceive it is because we’ve forgotten. From infinite love and oneness came a ‘tiny mad idea’ that spawned the dream of time and space, a dream of separate bodies.
The ego is a manufactured substitute for God. When we dare to question its foundation of fear, we will finally come to discover an immense Source of love; the love that we had unsuccessfully pursued for so long. And we’ll be delighted to find it where it has always been, right here within.
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