NSFM introduces the first segment of our series on Connective Communication, or C2, which we developed for kids and parents as a fun, healthy, interactive way to improve communication skills and empower individuals. We want to evolve toward a future of more loving and peaceful families, relationships, and countries. It starts with each one of us—our kids are our future!
In spite of our best intentions, much of our “loving” communication results in misunderstandings, anger, hurt, tears, sadness and frustration. C2 uses questions, tools and a new language, the language of compassion, to move us beyond reacting to what people say. Then, we begin to learn and understand their hidden needs, empowering us to let go of blame, guilt and anger.

Connective Communication is an important part in our vision to Inspire Conscious Parenting and Empowered Kids because it incorporates an underlying trust and understanding of identifying needs and intentions when we communicate. C2 is a combination of simple, yet dynamic and transformational tools to empower kids as well as adults, teachers, administrators, mothers, fathers, executives--anyone, anywhere! Enjoy the journey through C2 Connective Communication over the next few months and let us know how it changes your life.

For our purpose, we will define communication as:
The sharing of information through interactions for the purpose of understanding one another.

Let’s take a closer look at this definition.

“Sharing” tells us that communication happens between two or more entities, a sender and one or more receivers, which can be people, kids, dogs, countries, or...

“Information” is the message that is being relayed or sent. It might be true or false, a thought or an emotion, a dream or a fear—anything at all.

“Interactions” are the social circumstances in which communication occurs. For example, a casual phone conversation, a formal discussion, a letter, or the sniff of a dog meeting someone new.

“For the purpose of understanding one another” explains why communication takes place—in order to express our perspective and to have the other person acknowledge and understand it.

There are many forms of communication, such as sounds, signs, letters, symbols, looks, whistles, words, sentences and even smells! Depending on the type of communication, there is also context, feeling, expression, and tone – all of which gives meaning to our messages. Sometimes we think we are delivering a clear message but the listener receives a different message than what we intended.

C2 is the culmination of experiences, books, theories, experimentation, family coaching, and the wonderful synchronicity of the universe delivered at just the right time with Marshall Rosenberg’s transformational book Nonviolent Communication and Read Right! by Dee Tadlock, with Rhonda Stone. C2 creates more positive, effective, and meaningful communication by addressing the blocks to clear communication. It helps uncover the feelings beneath angry or hurtful words eliminating blame. C2 is the product of years of experience, research, reading, theorizing, experimentation and success in coaching families. Enjoy your journey to better communication.
Do Negative Thoughts, Emotions And Language Matter?

Science is discovering that negative thoughts, emotions, language and reactions create a harmful pattern of stress in our body. While short bursts of stress may boost our immune system, prolonged day-to-day stress wears us down and is a precursor to poor health. How we feel affects the ability of our body and mind to run well. In “The Biology of Belief,” Bruce Lipton gives an in-depth biological explanation of how our beliefs about the world affect our physical development and well-being. (Find more on The Biology of Belief on our website.)
Do Our Feelings Affect Our Communication?
Yes! If we feel sad, we are more sensitive to what someone says. Studies show that the brain uses our emotions as a means of protection, helping determine what to pay attention to as it tries to make sense out of our world. Negative emotions create resistance in our body, mind and spirit and that resistance influences our reactions based how we see the world, usually on a sub-conscious level. In a wonderfully inspiring movie called “The Secret,” they explore the law of attraction, and the possibility that we get what we think and “feel” about, even the negative thoughts! (Find more on “The Secret” on our website.) Eliminating negative emotions opens up the pathways to hope, discovery, and learning.
What’s Wrong With How We Communicate Now?
That’s exactly the point! We tend to speak in rights and wrongs, casting blame and judgment as we talk. Our basic communications and tools leave us feeling guilty, defending our position, and ultimately separating us from each other and our purpose for being in each other’s lives. There is a better way and it requires a new language and new tools for interaction to bring us together. A commitment to learning a new language and using new tools starts the process of creating new neural pathways based on trust and love. Along the way we might just discover we have a much better chance of getting our needs met.
Is It Worth The Effort?
In the past several months, C2 dramatically changed the lives of many families, including adults and kids. The rewards of healthy, happy, growing relationships keep spreading outward, empowering more and more lives along the way. This is the beauty of learning Connective Communication—we learn to give from the heart. It is simple, yet dynamic, and as we become more conscious and empowered in our communication, we enable others toward empowerment.
This month we introduce C2 Part 1: Family Meetings, a powerful tool for everyday use. We look forward to your input and comments as you discover C2 and as we proceed forward in our mission To Inspire Conscious Parenting and Empowered Kids.

Author's Bio: 

Sue Woodward is the co-founder and Editor In Chief of North Star Family Matters magazine and she also is an EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) practitioner. Book her to speak the Connective Connection in your mom's group of family seminars.
Visit her www.northstarfamilymatters.com
and find out more about articles written by her