I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant." Robert McCloskey

With conscious communication we can attract the life we want in our personal relationships and in our businesses.

Spend time today being conscious of what you say to others and how others react to your words. It will make you more attractive!

Are You Sure You Understood What I Think I Said?
I have come to believe that communication is at the heart of all relationships. The problem with communication is that we don't always communicate clearly and directly. Often people don't want to communicate directly for fear of hurting the other person's feelings, being rejected, or simply not wanting to deal with what the results of the communication might be.

We need to take responsibility for how we communicate, not for how the other person will process what we have to say. We can't be responsible for the other person's feelings. That doesn't mean that we just dump on others, it means we communicate in a responsible manner where we speak our truth with the intention of supporting and caring for the other person. In my seminars, I explain that words are very powerful, and as the communicator, we have the responsibility of communicating as clearly and effectively as we can.

Not all people process information in the same way. What we say may not be what someone hears. As the communicator, we have the responsibility to make sure that what we are saying is clear and understood by the receiver. Don't assume because you understood what you said, others will.

Gender, culture and ethnicity can make a difference. Not everyone communicates in
the same manner or wants to be communicated to in the same manner. In a business environment it may be inappropriate to communicate by touching or hugging. It may be normal in the United States to raise our voice and express our opinions but in many Eastern culures this communication manner is offensive.

Keep in mind that people are different and even if we have a great message, if we can't say it in a way others can understand what we are saying, it won't make much difference.

There are certain words and phrases we get into our vocabulary that we say without much thought. With my coaching clients and for me personally I have noticed that "sorry" is one of those words. I have even bumped into a wall and said "sorry" before realizing what I had done. If we want to apologize for something, that is fine; however an apology without sincerity doesn't mean much. Instead of saying sorry, how about really thinking about what it is we are sorry about and apologizing for that. This way we can have a sincere connection with the other person, instead of simply saying something by habit.

Often times we say things without thinking about them and without much meaning. Becoming more aware of what we are saying will allow us to be more connected to others and ourselves. By being aware of what we are saying we become more conscious of how we are saying something is affecting others and how it is affecting us. Simply saying words out of force of habit doesn't really add anything to the conversation or support the other person, or ourselves for that matter.

Being more conscious of what you are saying and it will allow you connect at a deeper level, both with others and yourself.

Author's Bio: 

Attraction Expert, Seminar Leader, Certified Coach

About Deanna Frazier

Tired of living a mediocre existence? Want more time, money and passion in your life?
Deanna Frazier inspires people to BECOME what they WANT so they can ATTRACT the PERFECT life they created by their own design.
Isn't it just about time:
• For some new ideas and techniques to bring that “want” to real life.
• To engage in thought-provoking conversation?
• To challenge conventional wisdom?
• To refocus your energies?
• For a fresh viewpoint related to your own needs?
• To develop an action plan to reach your goals?

Deanna Frazier, Attraction Expert, Professional Certified Coach and Seminar Leader, has been changing lives for thirty years through her thought-provoking executive leadership, coaching, and seminars. She is a catalyst for individuals and organizations that choose to transform through their own wisdom. She currently offers transformational seminars and coaching to corporate executives, creative entrepreneurs, sales professionals, managers, and individuals.

Dee's coaching and her new book, Dating 101, The Second, Third, or Fourth Time Around, has garnered national attention, including an interview with Katie Couric on The Today Show.

Her business experience includes executive roles in multiple industries. In the mid-70's, as a founding executive of one of America's most successful behavior modification firms, she led individuals to quit smoking; moreover, in the process she helped build a highly successful and profitable company. As President of a career consulting firm, she expanded it to eight offices nationally, following the mission of "Do what you love and the money will follow." Her wealth of business acumen and experience in training others has prepared her to quickly discern what her clients' needs are, where energies may be refocused, and what actions can be taken to help clients reach their goals by becoming what they want to Attract.
Dee is a member of the International Coaching Federation, the National Speakers Association, Vice President of Programs for the North Texas Chapter of the National Speakers Association, and the Women of Vision International. Dee also runs The University of Dating for individuals who want to succeed in finding their special partner or just have fun dating.