Did You Really Mean That?

I was driving on the highway the other day behind a truck that had a bumper sticker on it. As I read the bumper sticker it gave me the idea for this article. The bumper sticker read: “If you ain’t a Buckeye fan, you ain’t s**t.” Well, I have no idea who the Buckeyes are and it really isn’t important, because what struck me was how often we say things that we don’t really mean and, more than that, what it actually means for us in terms of what we attract to ourselves in life.

In this particular example, the assumption must be from what it says that if you are a Buckeye fan then you are s**t. I’m pretty sure that’s not the meaning that was intended, but if you think about it, that’s exactly what it’s saying.

Being aware of what you say is particularly important when you think about the Law of Attraction, the principle that what you focus on is what you attract. This includes what you say. So, for example, if you frequently exclaim that someone is “a pain in the neck” (or some other body part) if you started to develop neck problems you probably would not associate it with your statement. But the Law of Attraction would tell you that this is exactly what’s happening – you develop the neck problem as a result of what you habitually say.

I play tennis and it’s a wonderful sport. It can also be very frustrating when you hit a shot that doesn’t go where you want it to go, particularly if that means your opponent wins the point. Go out onto any public tennis courts and I can just about guarantee that you will hear people shouting things like: “you idiot”, “how could you be so stupid”, “what a pathetic serve” and so on. These are all things that people are shouting at themselves, not at their opponents. I must admit to being somewhat guilty of this myself from time to time, but now when I do it, I at least stop and cancel out what I just said.

If you think about it and just listen to people you’ll hear them saying things all the time that reinforce just what they don’t want in their lives. Things like:

• I can’t afford it
• I always end up in the longest line
• Nobody ever listens to me
• The economy is so bad, everything’s a struggle right now
• I hate being bored
• I hate being stuck in traffic
• So and so is better than me
• And so on…

In just the same way that we need to monitor our thoughts, to be aware of what we’re focusing on and putting energy towards, we also need to be aware of what we say. We often say things without even realizing just what we’re saying.

I was once a member of a mastermind group that met twice a month. The purpose of the group being to help the members grow both personally and professionally. We became aware of the fact that each of us had a tendency to be negative about ourselves in certain areas and would say things that were not helping us achieve what we wanted. So we instituted a fine. We each had our own statements or things that we needed to avoid saying, and each time we were caught saying it, we had to pay $1. It worked very well because it really helped to make us aware of what we were saying and how frequently we were saying it. We used the money we collected to go out to lunch – and of course, some members ended up contributing a lot more to the lunch than others!

If you like a challenge, then try this. You may have to ask someone else to monitor you - someone you spend a lot of time with, because it can be difficult to notice it yourself. The goal is just to be aware of when you say something that you really don’t mean and that is really not helpful to you. Once you’re aware of it, then you can change it. If you catch yourself saying something that you really didn’t want to say, then you can always say ‘cancel’ afterwards, or change what you said to a more positive statement. For example, instead of saying “I can’t afford it” you can say “I choose to spend my money on other things right now”, or something similar.

Awareness is the key to making any significant change in your life. Don’t underestimate the power of this one. Ask yourself – did I really mean what I just said?