Heart Freedom Exercises
Exercises To Do Together
by Al Link and Pala Copeland

Lovers’ Days

Asking your lover for what you want and giving your lover whatever has been requested are two sides of the same coin—a yin/yang balance of receiving/giving, and passive/active pleasure. Just as it is important to learn to freely ask for what pleases you, it is also important to know that you can give unconditionally. This playful practice helps you do just that.

Time for Exercise: two afternoons, evenings, or full days

Properties Required: varies with the play


  1. Each partner writes down a description of an ideal day with the other, describing a sensuous day of attention and focus on the writer. Your requests may be sensual, explicitly sexual (see Touch Me Like This ), gently affectionate, or caringly attentive actions—anything and everything from cuddling and back rubs, through story telling and poetry reading, to hours of kissing and exotic intercourse.
  2. Decide who is first to receive the attention—draw straws, flip a coin, pick a number. Next time it’s the other partner’s turn to receive.
  3. During your loving time, try to give your partner as many things on the list as you can. Points for you both to remember:
  • You know how to give your lover whatever has been requested without wondering “What’s in it for me?”
  • You know how to give joyously and freely.
  • You know how to receive graciously and respectfully.
  • You deserve to be treated like the king or queen you are
Author's Bio: 

Al Link and Pala Copeland own and operate 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra. They regularly host lover’s romantic weekends near Ottawa Canada, and weeklong retreats in exotic locations. For more information call toll free from Canada or USA: 1-800-684-5308 International long distance: 1-819-689-5308. Visit their website www.tantra-sex.com and their blog www.askaboutloveandsex.com or send email: 4freedoms@tantraloving.com They have four books published including Soul Sex: Tantra for Two, New Page, 2003; The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Supercharged Kama Sutra, Penguin, 2007; Sensual Love Secrets for Couples: The Four Freedoms Body, Heart, Mind and Soul, Llewellyn 2007; Tantra Step by Step: 28 Days to Ecstasy, Llewellyn 2007.