One of my clients was sinking fast in her new relationship. She had attracted another partner who did not make her or their relationship a priority. She had developed some pretty strong life management skills in all areas of her life, except in the dating area. She needed new strategies for using the Law of Attraction. Although difficult for her, she needed to take a look at her negative behaviors in this relationship that were creating a lot of contrast in her life. Contrast simply means what she did not want in her relationships or in her life.

She needed to start by becoming accountable for what she was attracting into her life and her relationships. She needed to ask herself the hard questions about what she was attracting, and then address the tough issues that were undermining her use of the Law of Attraction in dating.

We talked about getting clear, removing any blinders that she may have on, and finally dealing with the truth. This was her fifth relationship that was going down in flames. What were the patterns that may be destroying her ability to attract the perfect partner? At first, she resisted accepting any responsibility for attracting these kinds of relationships. As she continued to resist, she continued to attract more and more unacceptable behavior from her partner. By failing to acknowledge that she was using the Law of Attraction to attract these partners, whether negative or positive, her life in the meantime became more and more complicated.

Did she do this intentionally or on purpose? Absolutely not! Behind this contrast of attracting what she did not want in a relationship were limiting beliefs and thoughts. Staying in denial can take the form of totally failing to see what is, or seeing it but resisting it because you don’t like it. Either way, denial is dangerous. This common mistake can have uncommonly bad results when using the Law of Attraction in a way that creates more contrast in your life.

My client assumed that this is the way that it had to be. She clung to the ideas and beliefs that she had, unknowingly attracting one bad relationship after another. She clung to them because she did not know that she had them and was unaware of the havoc they caused in her life. She chalked up all of her bad relationships to a lack of available good partners.

Had she known how to use the Law of Attraction more deliberately and intentionally in attracting a perfect partner, she might have awakened sooner. She trusted and had confidence in the rightness of what she believed to be true and, therefore, it was very easy for her to close her mind to the possibility that there were other kinds of partners that she could attract that would be a perfect match.

Many people fail to grasp that, when you choose your behavior and thoughts, you choose the consequences. By choosing to keep her focus on her unknown negative thoughts and beliefs, she let precious time and energy slip away—time and energy that could have been focused on changing those beliefs and thoughts rather than resisting them.

Fortunately, my client made a dramatic turnaround. She chose to work on changing her limiting thoughts and beliefs, and to take action. Thereby, she chose to attract her perfect match. Now she was using the Law of Attraction in way that worked for her, and was getting more and more of what she wanted.

What choices have you made that set you up for an outcome that you did not want or need? Have your dating problems been mundane or have they been monumental?

Author's Bio: 

Copyright © 2009. Beverly Boston, Eve-olutionAtLast, All rights reserved. Beverly Boston helps women of all ages, especially women aged 50-55, attract all the business you REALLY want and have clients call you. For the last several years, Beverly has been using Law of Attraction Coaching principles, tools, tips, techniques and showing her clients the “how to” Law of Attraction results formula. For more information visit