Sometimes even the safe paths we choose and prepare for ourselves can lead us over a cliff or slam us into an abrupt dead end. Over and over we find we have to retreat, regroup and head in some new direction. We begin to obsess---we worry, we plot, we plan and we analyze how we can stem the tides and take control of our lives. We deny what we truly want while we exhaust ourselves trying to turn all our lemons into lemonade. And lastly, we give up all sense of our power to affect the course of our lives and we succumb to our greatest fears and doubts.

The question is---If you were to follow the currents in your heart instead of trying to hold on to the sides of life, could you go with the flow without going under? The answer is ---Yes, if you have the right tools.

Change is a journey and it does not matter whether it was planned and you were well prepared or it is forced upon you. In order to take this journey and survive it, you need to have the proper travel gear. You will need a map of the territory and a compass to help you know where you are headed. You need perspective to assess where you are and a strategy for getting where you want to go. You need people you can turn to along the way and finally, you will need adequate fuel to get there.

If you understand the process of change, you will never be lost. As long as your energy is moving forward in a desired direction, the stages you will experience can be exhilarating and empowering, even enjoyable.

Change can come in the face of reality. It involves recognizing when it is time to move on and accepting that you will forever be the same until you accept that only you can take charge of managing you life.

Change may be saying goodbye to where you have been, releasing the past, and letting go of a familiar routine so you can free up the time and energy you need to create a new future.

Change may be finding your way. You may have to dig down and reconnect with your inner compass, that deep inner sense or conviction about who you are, regardless of your external circumstances.

Change may be saying hello to where you are going. If a change is being forced upon you, embrace the future and focus on a specific new direction. Commit to a course of action and develop a strategy. Make the time and generate the energy to put your show on the road. Experiment, initiate, and follow through—this involves handling whatever challenges arise, juggling your life as it is, while you create a new life.

Sometimes change can be like a rear-end collision--sudden and completely unexpected. Other times it is more like a running out of gas-- gradual and accompanied with ample warning signs you may or may not heed

Whether it is sudden or gradual, chosen or inflicted upon you, the moment of truth comes when you know you must do something. It is not enough to simply see the signs; you also have to get the message. Change can be all consuming and overwhelming.

If you feel traumatized by the changes you are going through, think of what you need to do to recover. Regenerate and recharge yourself and never be afraid to reach out. The best thing about facing the reality of change is that once you do, you are on your way.

Like the ruins of an ancient building, certain aspects of what has been in your life must collapse before you can build a new life upon the remains.

When your life is changed against your will, don’t allow anger and resentment to prolong the anguish. The best and only resolve is to go on about the business of creating a new life for you. To do that successfully, you must first forgive the perpetrator of the change, not for their sake but to free yourself. You have to accept life as it is before you can make something new from it. “It is what it is”.

Don’t blame others for your situation. Try not to allow your future to be controlled by choices other people make. Do not allow the circumstances of your life to define your life. Everybody makes mistakes and we all have shortcomings but in spite of that reality, we also deserve an opportunity to have a good life.

One of the best things about dealing with issues like blame, regret and resentment is the tremendous amount of energy that’s freed up once you are no longer imprisoned by them.

When you are changing directions, you must connect with the essence of who you are so that you can find the inner passions that will guide you, naturally and easily, in a satisfying new direction. First, know yourself, find what gives you joy and then take a stand to do it. “What you do to get somewhere is who you become when you arrive.” You can only be what you give yourself the power to be.

The bigger and more dramatic the change, the more of an emotional workout you go through. If you pay attention to your emotions instead of trying to avoid them, they can be your best possible guides for navigating the tides of change.

Most people are extremely confident in what they cannot do. We need to place far more confidence in our dreams than in our weaknesses. Somewhere down the line we were told, probably by someone we love, that we were not capable of fulfilling our dreams; that’s when we began to believe it. These core beliefs that run our life manifest themselves every time we say or think things like: “I can’t do it”, “it will never happen to me”, “I’m not deserving”, “I’m not good enough”. These are only some of the nagging thoughts we all carry around that have sabotaged our lives. Think about taking a risk, believing in yourself and following your dreams instead.

Tragic events happen. It is a part of life.

It takes courage to empower yourself through these events. But when you use these times to expand your horizons, they become blessings. All the events in your past provide an opportunity to grow, change, learn and explore.

Work like you don’t need money, love like you’ve never been hurt and dance like nobody’s watching.

If you like this article and want more information on having “a better life” visit and download your free copy of 101 Golden Keys to Success and Fulfillment in Life. Great tips on success, relationships and motivation.

Author's Bio: 

The author Linda Morneau is a motivational speaker and workshop facilitator. Through her studies of Reiki, Hypnosis, Emotional Freedom Techniques, meditation and her personal experiences with devastating loss, Linda has developed a message with direction and hope. Contact her or