Now That You Have Good Social Skills, Try This

Good social skills aren't restricted to having the ability to go up to a group of strangers and introduce yourself. They also include being aware of those around you and recognizing that others may need a hand meeting people or interacting with others.

This skill involves your making it easier for newcomers and others to feel welcome and comfortable with unfamiliar people and in different surroundings in which you're comfortable.

Remember what it was like to have gone to a dinner party, BBQ, or a networking event where you didn't really know anyone? Or when you were the "new guy" at work and you went with the rest of your department to the surprise birthday party for someone you hadn't even met yet? Sure, you kind of knew some of the people there and perhaps you knew a couple of them pretty well, but they were busy mixing with other people. Basically, the people you didn't know far outnumbered the people you did.

Before you knew what to say and how to act in social situations, you likely felt awkward and uncomfortable because you were standing alone thinking that everyone was looking at you: the person who didn't know anyone. Do you recall what a relief it would have been if someone had come over to you, introduced himself then took you around and introduced you to other people? Wouldn't it have felt good if someone saw you standing there and invited you into their conversation?

That's what we're talking about now in this advanced social skill. While you no longer need someone to welcome you into the group, there are still people who don't have the skills you do and need the extra help. That's where you come in.

This is particularly important when someone is entering an already established group for the first time - like a club, association or organization that meets regularly. The newcomer probably doesn't know the protocol, where to register, sit, or what. If you're already part of the group or a member, it should be easy for you to greet her, introduce her to others and give her some information on the meeting, agenda, or format. Or you could just welcome her, get to know her and help her feel comfortable in the new surroundings. In effect, you become like a host.

The benefits to you for taking the initiative to include the new person is that by doing so, you're making a great first impression and creating a new relationship. In her view, you're the one person who, out of all those other people, did something for her without having been asked. It was you who took the time and made the effort to make her feel welcome and included. Just doing this simple action demonstrates your confidence, friendliness, and really good social skills.

When you're comfortable to act on this skill, it shows how socially proficient you are because you're really thinking "outside" of yourself - you're taking an interest in another and not focusing on yourself.

Relieving someone from the uncomfortable position of standing by herself by involving her in the group is a very appreciated gesture and one not soon forgotten. This little practiced yet valuable social skill will make you stand out from the crowd.