We need to look at human behavior and why we do the things that we do. All of us are made up of atoms. Atoms behave in a certain way and their behavior is a good model to use to understand human behavior.

There are 3 atomic bonds: Ionic bonds, Covalent bonds and Metallic bonds.

The Ionic bond is a ‘give and take’ relationship between two atoms. Electrons are transferred from one atom to the other.

The Covalent bond is a ‘sharing’ relationship. Instead of one atom losing an electron and the other gaining an electron, these atoms share one or more electrons. Sometimes the sharing is equal and other times the sharing is unequal.

The Metallic bond has the characteristics of both Ionic and Covalent bonds. It 'shares' and 'gives and takes'.

An example of the Ionic bond can be found in the bonding of sodium and chloride. Sodium has an extra electron, and chloride only has 7 electrons in the outer orbit. When the extra electron of sodium is given to chloride, chloride then becomes stable and sodium gets rid of the extra electron.

The sodium after it gives up its electron, becomes positive because it now has more protons than electrons. Chloride now becomes negative because it has more electrons than protons. The sodium and chloride ions are now stable and the compound they create is called Salt.

This Ionic bond I am going to call ‘The Give-Take Relationship’. Each of these atoms has found another atom that can give it what it wants and needs. By giving, they also receive.

With a Covalent bonding, atoms are co-dependent. An example of this is with the hydrogen atom. A hydrogen atom only has 1 electron, and so is unable to give up an electron. When 2 hydrogen atoms unite, they share the 2 electrons and this makes them both stable.

This is the same as when two people who need the same thing come together. They rely upon each other to remain stable. This type of relationship is not strong because neither person can be stable without the other. These relationships have what you could call a ‘low boiling’ point and break easily. I am going to call this bond ‘The Sharing Relationship’.

In a Metallic bond there is both a sharing and a give and take of electrons. This is a very strong type of bond, and metals have a very high boiling point, so hence the name Metallic bond.

The outer electrons of metal are not bound closely. When 2 metal atoms come together the electrons can move freely amongst the nuclei within the crystal. They slip over each other, but stay bonded to each other by the attractive forces that exist. Within in this bond there is a sharing of the electrons and also giving and taking. This bond has a flexibility not found in any other bond.

An example of this bond is a ‘stable marriage’, where both people have the ability to not only share with each other, but they also give and take from the other person. They are both independent in this relationship, through the give and take process, and yet also create a dependence upon each other by sharing what each has.

The bond becomes stronger as time goes on because they have the flexibility to move about freely within the relationship, trusting each other not to bond (cheat) with anyone else. Neither person in this relationship wants to break the bond because not only are they filling the other persons void, but their voids are being fulfilled also.

I am going to call this metallic bond ‘The Fulfilling Relationship’.

Behavior becomes erratic or unstable when all of our voids are not met. When 2 atoms come together and aren’t able to fill each others voids, the created compound is known as a ‘Radical’. Just as with human relationships, we become radical or rebellious to others and ourselves when our needs aren’t met.

Why do some people eat food that isn’t healthy? Or smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol, do drugs or anything else that is unhealthy? It is simply that for many it is better to fill a void with something, than with nothing at all.

I think that we suffer in relationships because we are confused about what type of relationship we are in. You need to determine what your relationship is and then ask yourself a few questions. What do you give and what do you take from this relationship? What type of relationship does the other person think you have? If there is a problem with the relationship, can it be corrected? Or maybe you need to be separated from the relationship? This is true not just for a lover’s relationship, but it also holds true for relationships you have with friends, family, your children, co-workers, etc.

If you would like to know why you do the things that you do in relationships, then sign up for my TeleClass at www.LifesOneLaw.com. Click on the TeleClass tab to register for "Discover Your Specific Answer To Solve Any Conflict – Guaranteed!" Copyright 2009 Life's One Law

Author's Bio: 

Philip C. Agrios, DC, DACBSP, is a graduate of Logan College of Chiropractic, Chesterfield, Missouri. Dr. Agrios earned his Doctor of Chiropractic (DC) degree in 1985. Prior to his studies at Logan, he attended the University of Scranton, Scranton, Pennsylvania.

Dr. Agrios holds board certification in sports medicine from the American Chiropractic Board of Sports Physicians. One of his research papers, entitled, Double Crush Syndrome of the Upper Extremity can be found in the September 1999 Journal of Sports Chiropractic and Rehabilitation. Dr. Agrios’ distinguished career includes not only that of lecturer, but also of team chiropractor for local, state and national sports teams. He is the proud father of two loving and supportive daughters.

In 2000, Dr. Agrios, was no longer able to practice chiropractic due to a disability. He sold his practice to Monmouth Total Health Care in Eatontown, New Jersey and attained the position of Marketing Director. Although marketing proved to be rewarding, he felt he was not fulfilling his life’s purpose. At this point, he believed he was destined to begin the quest to reverse his own disability.

Throughout the following year, he embarked upon his program encompassing a regime of nutritional therapy, chiropractic treatment and a unique specialized strengthening program. He decided he would achieve his own rehabilitation program by applying the principles he discovered throughout his career. He calls these principles, “Life’s One Law.” This unique combination enabled him to resume his practice and continue to help others through his education, training and personal experience.

He now dedicates his life to teaching the principles of “Life’s One Law” to others. He has created seminars, DVD’s, CD’s, internet courses and other avenues so others may be helped using the same principles as he did to continue on their journey of life, thereby attaining optimal health, wealth and happiness. Dr Agrios’ life experiences, although filled with many tragic events, has prompted him to write about suffering. His perspective is not only from a clinical point of view but provides his readers with pertinent examples taken from his own personal life experiences.