A Self Care Tip That Really Works!!

If you are anything like me, you are looking for ways to make your career and home life easier and to add more meaning. Weekly Tips for Busy Women has been many years in the making, combining information with inspiration. I am happy to share these tips to help, inform, challenge and empower you to be your best.

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(estimated reading time - 90 seconds)
Self care is a topic that makes most women cringe. They feel guilty discussing the things they would like to do for themselves and often feel judged by others, especially other women. However, we all need to give each other permission to put self care first and to acknowledge each other for doing what we may feel we want and need.

Self care often feels selfish – it’s not. It’s actually selfless because you cannot give to others what you don’t have to give. It begins with self esteem; the inner confidence that we are adequate and worthy of respect and goodness.

Self care is often just getting your basic needs met. A great reminder is the acronym H.A.L.T. When we are stressed we can watch for the need to HALT and give ourselves special attention when we are feeling:

Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired

Begin using this reminder to help set healthy limits for yourself. Testing the limits of your ability to handle enormous amounts of stress without tending to your own emotional needs is a recipe for disaster.

Self care means we learn to tell the truth, we learn to say no and we make choices from a place of love and compassion instead of guilt and obligation.

Self care takes patience, willingness, commitment and practice but is the most empowering thing you can do for yourself and the people you love.

On a personal note:

The major “aha” moment regarding self care came when I read a description of an extrovert versus an introvert while I was learning about my son’s Attention Deficit Disorder. In this description, an extrovert was someone who received their energy from being around other people; an introvert received their energy from being by themselves and became drained being around people for extended periods of time. A light bulb went off in my head – I was a classic introvert! That explained why I was so drained at the end of the day when I spent most of the day around other people, why I always felt the need to sneak off to have quiet time, why I enjoyed the company of one good friend rather than a group. When I learned to apply HALT, I realized that I wasn’t feeling depleted when I was Lonely, but when I was around too many people for too long of period of time. This simple awareness and reminder has made a wonderful difference in my life.