What do you want?
Take a moment. Really think about it. I mean it. Don’t just keep reading on without taking the time to answer that question. Stop now and seriously consider the question – what do you want? Do you know the main reason why people do not get what they want? They have never taken the time to figure out exactly what they want!
Now that you’ve taken the time to consider this seemingly simple question, what did you come up with? Did you find it easy to come up with the answer? Did you have several answers?
If you did come up with several answers, I want you to take a little more time, and dig just a little deeper. Ask yourself why you want it. Why do you want the BMW? Why do you want the Caribbean cruise? Why do you want the new job? Why do you want that special someone in your life? Why do you want more money?
Think about it. It’s important that you know the answer without someone else just giving it to you.
Knowing why you want something will provide you with the motivation and enthusiasm to go out there in the world and achieve it.
So what did you come up with when you asked yourself why?
Well, I guess if I had those things, I’d feel great, life would be good and I’d be happy!
If the answer you came up with was similar to this one, then you’ve hit on a very important fact about every human being on this planet: we all want to be happy. Think about it – this s the most fundamental desire among our species. What can beat that feeling of happiness?
You’ve now taken a large step with that realisation that many people never take in their lives. You know what you want and why you want it. Next comes the fun part – the process of getting it!
How do I do that, you ask?
Well, if we boil what you want right down to true happiness, then the answer is very simple: become aware of your habitual thoughts, your inner dialogue, if you will. Throw out the negative, disempowering thoughts as they come in and replace them with empowering, supportive ones.
The quickest, easiest way to get happy is to start to think happy. Your emotions, your life and indeed your destiny is controlled by your thoughts. Think the same negative thoughts day in and day out and you’re guaranteed to drive the things and circumstances you want right out of your life.
Now on a more practical level you should assess where you are in your life. Are you exactly where you want to be? Do you have the perfect partner, the perfect job, perfect health, enough time and money to suit your every whim? Most people reading this are not in this position.
Take the time to look at where you are in relation to where you want to be, and look at the gap that separates the two. Now begin to think of ways you can fill that gap. What are specific actions you can take today to begin to bridge that gap?
I’m not saying that you should look to bridge the gap all in one giant step in one day. That’s not how this is done. You won’t go from driving a 20 year old clunker to a brand new Ferrari over night! But if that Ferrari is your dream car, start thinking of ways to bring that into your life. What things will you need to do? What will you need to change in your life? What will you be willing to go without in order to achieve this goal?
Would you be willing to go without mindlessly watching TV every night? Would you be willing to go without alcohol? Would you be willing to go without wasting your time at meaningless pursuits that do not move you towards your goal?
The bottom line is that if you want things in your life to change, you’re going to have to change some things in your life. That’s not some trite axiom – that’s the honest truth.
Start by writing down a list of all your goals in every area of your life. Really take some time at this. Leave the list for a few days and then go back to it and refine it. Think about your goals every day. Think about ways to move towards them. Write these ways down as well as any associated ideas that occur to you.
When you begin to do this, an amazing thing happens. Your reticular activating system is activated in your brain, and the circumstances, events and people that will lead you in the direction you want to go in begin to show up in your life.
Your reticular activating system (RAS) is that part of your brain that will allow you to start noticing these things and will allow you to pass on to your subconscious the images and positive thoughts associated with your goals. See, it’s not that these people and events haven’t been around you before. It’s just that before you were focused on your goals and ways to achieve them, you never noticed these things.
It’s like when you buy a new car, you begin to notice many other people driving that same car. They’ve always been there, but you never paid any attention to them.
So decide on your goals, keep them present in your mind and banish all negative thoughts about them. And most importantly, when the opportunities come, as they surely will, take them! Do not be shy or afraid. Go for it with all the enthusiasm you an muster!
Dante Petrilla has been studying the success literature for the past decade and used the techniques and skills he learned to turn his own life completely around. He transformed himself from a depressed person to a happy person once he learned to direct the focus of his thoughts and emotions. The one thing he found that made the techniques he learned so effective was the use positive affirmations to install them into everyday thinking. Dante is also a writer who enjoys writing in the personal development area.
Dante is also a memory training expert, and has written the book How to Memorize Anything with The Secret of Your Perfect Memory which is available on Amazon. He is also in the process of turning this into an audio book, which will be available in the near future.
Dante is an AUNLP certified life coach and NLP Master Practitioner, member of the American University of NLP, and also a Global Sciences Foundation member. He is now making a deeper study of NLP in order to implement what he has learned on his journey so that he might impart that knowledge and help others.