Are Your Expectations Too High for Your Relationship?
Written by Guy Russell
We are all human beings, and as such have strengths and weaknesses. One of the benefits of being human is the ability to work on our own weaknesses and improving our own lives and others around us. There are numerous “self help gurus” whose basic principle is improving how you view yourself to improve your own life. Of course it is easy just settle on our expectations of yourself and others instead of making changes, but it is the complacency that will affect who we are as an individual and how we are viewed in our partners eyes.
So what should you expect from your relationship and your partner? The answer is everything. You should expect everything from your partner and your relationship. Push each other, and be comfortable doing so, as your partner should want to be everything in your eyes as you want to be everything in theirs. Of course this means that there is work that has to be performed at all times, and that less time will be available to just relax and watch the grass grow. But one thing to remember is that life is too short to just sit back and watch it pass you by. Grab life by the horns and be somebody, enjoy what all life has to offer, and be the inspiration and motivation within your relationship, and do not settle. Will there be disappointment with this type of attitude? Of course there will, but failure is only a failure if there is no attempt. Success comes after many failures and yet continually striving for the goal.
Relationships are work, and we all want to have a happy and rewarding relationship. In a modern day of convenience, it has become more the norm to just settle on our own expectations, or to pack up and move on instead of working out our issues and striving to be more than what we are. If you have ever been into a craft that required patience and skill whether it is knitting, model building, carpentry for example, you will have found a sense of joy and accomplishment of producing something of beauty that required devotion, time and effort. Not to mention that you probably enjoyed the process of the creation and devotion of the creation of the item. A relationship is even more rewarding because the two of you work to build something unique and enjoyable for just the two of you.
If your expectations are unreasonable to yourself, then maybe you should be a little more realistic in your approach, but you should not lower your reasonable expectations as a means to being happy within a relationship. Instead, you should be open and honest with your partner about what you want, need, and desire from each other and the relationship as a whole, and provide a healthy environment conducive to progress instead of stagnation. Being comfortable within a relationship does not mean not making attempts to keep it alive. On the same note, if you reduce your expectation based upon the results you currently have, this will only build resentments for doing so, and in the back of your mind you will feel as if you settled. Having that in the back of your mind will eventually have it come to the forefront.
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