Can you Learn to be Confident

My answer to that question is a resounding yes! You can learn to be confident. As a matter of fact confidence is the result of learned behavior. We have either learned to be or not to be confident based on our experiences in life. The confident person has learned that they in fact can overcome adversity or the problems which people and circumstances in life will present to them.

If you have been around for more than a year or two and you are not confident you can get there but it will require work. I have noticed that most small children seem to be virtually fearless. They haven’t learned to be afraid of certain situations and they take their cues from adults. Have you ever seen a small child fall to the ground and then look around at the adults to see if it should cry?

It is very difficult, but if we can divorce our minds of the limitations which we have learned to place on ourselves we will be able to accomplish so much more in life. Confidence will come through experience. If we have only experienced defeat in life we need to place ourselves in the place where we can have some victories, even if they are just small victories. Once we have gotten a small victory we can move on to major victories. The small wins will eventually add up to something major. Past failures create fear. The person who is fearful has a history of past failure. The person who has a history of victory has learned from those victories and fully expects to be victorious in future endeavors. The confident person is not afraid to tackle new issues or face new problems. Problems and situations are nothing but a challenge.

Let me use myself as an example. I teach a bible study from time to time. There is one student who will try their best to ask me questions that I can’t answer. The problem with that is that person can’t confuse me because I know that I have the true spirit of God. I welcome any question that that person asks because I am confident of the Spirit of God. As long as I can keep connected they won’t win. I don’t feel inadequate in this situation because I know that I know. I will never attempt to teach a subject which I have not thoroughly studied beforehand and I know how to listen to the voice of God for my answer. If this were not the case I would certainly have a major problem.

What are the things that trigger your feelings of inadequacy? Are they factors which you recognize? If you recognize them then you can control them. Sometimes the triggers are people who have dominated our lives. This could be a mother, father, sibling, or spouse.

Learn how to do the opposite of the negative which the trigger elicits in you. Don’t be afraid to deal with the issue. If you need to break it down into tiny bite sized pieces then do so by all means. Remember your victories. Learn from your defeats then put them behind you. Defeats are useful in that they can be used as stepping stones for bigger things. Allow them to be the springboard which propels you into your destiny.

You can learn to be confident but I guarantee that it will take some time. Confidence in one area doesn’t guarantee confidence in another area. For example the prize fighter may not be a very good socialite. Skills have to be developed in each particular area. So if you want confidence you need to get to work. The Good Life