Dating 101 for Mr. Shy Guy

Going on a date can be very daunting, especially if you are a shy person. Some men make approaching women as easy as breathing, but for someone who’s shy, the task can be overwhelming. You’ve probably had more than an earful of advice on how to get out of your shell and approach women. But, it is never easy to change who you are, and even the best advice in the world cant take away the timidity of a shy guy. Feeling uncomfortable in social situations, not knowing what to say, or the mere lack of experience is enough to permanently scare a shy guy away from the dating world.

Are you chronically shy? Do you tremble at the thought of going up to a girl and striking a conversation with her? Scared that she will reject you? Then read on and learn—these tips are for you. Being honest and candid about who you are can be very disarming. There’s no point in making up a whole new persona, and pretending to be somebody else other than yourself. Why not try being upfront with women? If you are a terribly shy guy, be honest about it—tell her you’re not much of a player and being able to talk to her required every ounce of your willpower.

Just the fact that you were that determined to meet her is enough to charm her. Men are always allured with damsels in distress, and women are experts in using this ploy to their advantage. Well, if it works for them then there’s no way it won’t work for you, right? Try to turn the tables on them and be THE man in distress. Pick an issue on which women feel they are experts on, and can offer some assistance. You can’t go wrong if you seek style advice: ask her if red looks good on you, or is that green shirt a safer choice? Asking for her advice is one of the best ways to approach her, since she won’t think of it as a pickup.

Although a bar is always jam-packed with singles, it is not an ideal place to meet and talk to women. It’s much easier to engage another person in a conversation in places where there’s something to talk about. Choose a place with conversation-worth surroundings, such as a museum or an art gallery. Your icebreakers are plenty and at hand. Plus, you can be sure that the girl you’re talking to is not intoxicated, who thinks you’re just another guy trying to hit on her. Maybe you could talk about how well-preserved the fossils are, or how intriguing the painting is.

Everything is going smoothly: you’re engaging her in a conversation that’s been going on for some time, but your mind suddenly signs off, and you can’t think of what to say. The easiest solution is to repeat the last thing she said and turn it into a question. “You’re a vegetarian? So, how’s it like?” She'll never know you blacked out. Technology can be your best friend, if you talking face to face makes you want to pee in your pants. Use it to your advantage: you may not be a smooth talker, but you can still show her that you have a lot to say through a thoughtful, well-crafted email.

Think of the things you talked about during your previous date and play on it to talk about other things. Typed words are just as powerful as spoken words if you know what to type. Women always complain that men don’t know how to listen, so it’s your chance to prove them wrong. Instead of racking your brains on what to say next, simply pay attention to what she’s saying. You’ll surely come up with an appropriate response to the conversation, and she’ll appreciate you for knowing how to listen.