Dear Dr. Romance:

My ex and I lived in the UK.  She dumped me a few months ago and she went to France as an exchange student.  She will be back next year, but at that time I will have graduated and left school here, and she will be doing her final year here. so as you can see reading books about body language, appearance ,and etc does not help me. I want to understand what she's thinking. Should I go where she is?

Dear Reader:

It sounds like you are pursuing a lost cause.  She knows the schedule as well as you do, and she doesn't apparently care that you won't be seeing each other.  You are in danger of being seen as a stalker if you pursue a woman who isn't interested.  Find a face-to-face counselor in your own area, and get some help.  You need to clarify your idea of what a relationship is, and to get some objective feedback about your actions.  Read my article "Guidelines for Finding and Using Therapy Wisely"  and find some low-cost
counseling in your own area.  Dr. Romance's Guide to Finding Love Today will help you figure out how to develop a relationship you can count on.


For low-cost counseling, email me at

Author's Bio: 

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D. is a licensed psychotherapist in S. California since 1978 with over 30 years experience in counseling individuals and couples and author of 13 books in 17 languages, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction; The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again; Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage, The Commuter Marriage, and her newest, Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences. She writes the “Dr. Romance” blog, and the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email newsletter.