Do You Feel Like An Imposter?

Today, I want to talk to you about a topic that’s very sensitive but one I think affects us all. Running your own business can be pretty scary stuff –you have to make a lot of decisions and you’re accountable and responsible for making it work. Equally, it’s exciting to be your own boss, make the decisions and be responsible for its success…this can be a double-edged sword because of the presence of something called the “imposter syndrome”

Do you worry you’re not good enough?
Are you terrified that one day you’ll be ‘found out’?
Do you think that any success you’ve had so far has been down to luck?
Do you lie in wait for the day people realise you’re a big fraud?
If you said yes to any of these, you are not alone…I promise you. I have felt this too. This idea that we’re a big fraud and that really we’re just waiting for people to catch us out is one of the most common things women in business like you and me suffer from. You constantly worry that you’re not good enough to run a business and you might as well give up.

I’m here to let you know it’s not you and it’s not me….it’s actually all of us! I would be incredibly surprised if a woman in business said she had never doubted herself, lacked confidence or worried that she wasn’t up to the job. I’d even go so far and say it might be a little white lie.

Because we are all human and we are vulnerable and I think it’s the vulnerability piece that we’re so scared to talk about because it might make the other person think we’re not as successful as them. It’s like wanting to be like the Jones’ but in business.

As we know, this is a slippery slope because when you compare yourself to others, it creates a hell-like place in your mind and you never know peace of mind.

I love this quote from Max Ehrmann’s poem, Desiderata, which has always stuck in my mind (I’m not a poem-y kind of person but this one made an impression!)

“If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.”

There will always be people who are doing better than you (unless you’re Carlos Slim, Bill Gates or Warren Buffett) and there will always be people who are not doing as well as you just as people will be at different stages in their business – there will always be start-ups and there will be people who’ve been in business longer. Comparing ourselves with others is fruitless and spirit-damaging.

Here’s another line from Desiderata:

“But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.”

It’s time to build ourselves up from within and shut out that voice that tells you you’re not good enough. It’s time we just said “Enough!”