Does Marriage Counseling Work Or is it Doomed to Fail? Things You Must Consider

Does marriage counseling, or couples counseling as it's often called, work? The short answer is: maybe. Whether marriage counseling will work to help save your marriage depends on a number of factors. Ask yourself the following questions.
Are you both interested in getting counseling?
If it's one-sided or if one of you is coerced into counseling against your will or isn't willing to honestly contribute to the sessions, then it likely won't work. Yes, only one person can go to counseling even if their spouse doesn't wish to participate. However, while that might help the patient to deal with the marriage and all of its problems, it won't necessarily help the marriage itself. In fact, the therapy may just help the patient to deal with the possible demise of their marriage. Like marriage, counseling requires that you both want it and are willing to work at it.
Is your marriage based on friendship and love?
If you have a deep friendship and genuine love and affection for each other but are still having problems, yes, couple's therapy can help save the marriage. The right counselor can help you to navigate the problems you're experiencing so that you can ride through the rough waters and come out the other side intact and with better conflict resolution skills.
Did you seek therapy at an early point in your difficulties?
The sooner you start participating in counseling sessions after you've had a major conflict, the more likely marriage counseling will work. But if you wait too long, then your chances for a successful outcome drop dramatically. By then, you may have built up anger, resentment, hurt, bitterness and apathy toward the marriage. These will be additional obstacles to overcome and so your struggles will be greater.
The best way for marriage counseling to work is that you seek help as quickly as possible after you've encountered what seems like an insurmountable problem.
Are you statistically at a higher risk for divorce?
While approximately 50-percent of marriages end in divorce, there are some couples who are at an even higher risk than others who don't fit the following criteria:
o Did you marry at a very young age?
o Did you have a child out of wedlock before you married?
o Did you drop out of high school and didn't return to complete your basic degree or sought advanced technical education?
o Are you in a low income bracket?
o Are you an inter-faith or inter-racial couple?
o Does either or both of you have an addiction problem?
o Is either or both of you a child of divorce?
If you said, "yes" to any of those questions, that's not to say that your marriage is doomed. It just means that you have additional hurtles to overcome that some other couples don't have. Yes, marriage counseling can work but you will have to try harder to resolve your issues.
Are you both willing to do the work?
Marriage can be difficult. It requires much give and take. It requires often selfless sacrifices and compromise. It requires good communication skills. In short, it requires work.
Marriage counseling will necessitate that you be open to the process and that, if you don't already have the skills necessary to ensure a good marriage, that you are willing to work hard to acquire them.
Do you have the right counselor?
Not every counselor is the right one for every couple. It's important to interview several counselors and perhaps have an introductory session or two to make sure that ultimately you are both comfortable with your chosen counselor. You have to find a counselor who not only has the right qualifications but also is one that you both mesh with and believe can help you.
Does marriage counseling work? Ultimately, that's going to depend on the both of you.