First Date Tips By a Professional Matchmaker

Often the first thing men and women worry about when beginning a dating relationship is starting out on the right foot…or better yet avoided putting their foot in their mouth. When we first meet someone, whether it be a friend, perspective employer or date we tend to focus on all the wrong things. Our presentation, our looks and image. Appearance, although important is not the only key to a successful date. There are key elements and a few tips that will be helpful in guiding you into a successful, secure, and lasting relationship.nn- Pay attention to the signs or possible red flags. As we enter into each date, not only do we have hope that he or she may be the “one” person we have been searching for, we also overlook actions or mannerisms that may reveal volumes about their history. Their past as well as how they may have acted or reacted to situations or conflicts can better help you determine how they will deal with them in the future. nn- You should disclose what is relevant, what is important to you at the beginning and then ask the other person to do the same. It will help to conclude if both of you are right for each other. Listen carefully to what that person says. Early on, most people feel open to telling a prospective mate about what they are looking for since they have just met you & therefore have nothing to lose. If a man mentions that he does not want kids, odds are that is what he means. If a lady says she is the jealous type, believe her. Often what they casually mention in conversation may be just the tip of the iceberg. If hers or his personality traits and interests are not what you looking for, don’t ignore it. You can not change this person; take what they say at face value. If you ignore this it will create disappointment and misunderstandings later, down the road. nn- Get to know your date as a friend first, see if you share common interests and take time before becoming intimate if you are looking for a true partner. If you learn more about each other before having sex, you will have a chance to see if your attraction is on many different levels. Sex can sometimes be the foundation of the relationship but as a solo component, the relationship will not last.nn- On the first date, ask a lot of questions, and study the person’s body language to see if they are sincere. Also pay close attention to how they speak about their exes. Do they speak poorly of there previous relationships, if so that could be red flag. Ask detailed questions about their background, where they went to school, do they have kids and if they have ever been married before. When preparing for a job or buying a home or car we concentrate on the most important details and think them through thoroughly before taking them on…why wouldn’t we take the utmost care in directing our heart to do the same?