I spent a decade trying to forgive my abuser just so I could feel free again. I wanted to be free from being his victim long after the relationship ended. I had done so many forgiveness techniques without prevail. I read numerous books on forgiveness without them helping.
I discovered what worked for me. I wrote a book and it is currently being published. My book would not be available if it had not been for my abuse and having to learn happiness. From my darkest days stems many creative, inspirational, and wise thoughts designed to help others become better, happier, and healthier.
We all want to forgive to feel at peace. Forgiveness is not condoning the behavior. Forgiveness is not for them, it is for you. We all need to realise that point.
There is another forgiveness activity that helped me forgive. It was a forgiveness letter. I wrote a forgiveness letter that he would never see. In it, I wrote all my deepest, darkest feelings. At the end, I wrote, "I forgive you." I highly recommend making your own forgiveness letter. Be as honest as you can. Be true to yourself. No one needs to see it, but you. Do not hold back. I didn't and I am much better for it. The letter helped soothe a decade of being a prisoner of the abuse. For ten years, I did not realise I had the key to my own prison. We all have a key. Through reading, learning, and improving, we slowly unlock our mental prisons and let ourselves out.
My thoughts kept me his victim. I changed my thoughts and I became a survivor, instead. As a survivor, I can be my own boss, use my own judgement, and be free. No one can take that from me. I really hope these techniques help you as much as they have helped me.

Author's Bio: 

Brittany Gunderson is an author of many genres. She has been in a few abusive relationships in the past and is a Domestic Violence survivor. She developed many mental disorders from the abuse and finally found happiness after almost a decade. She spends time telling people about gratititude, appreciation, and happiness. She is very good at listening and being there for people. She enjoys helping people. She is a Happiness/Mental Health Life Coach. Her email is You can find her on twitter at Her videos are on youtube.