Relationships are everything...simply because they are all that exist. Nothing has meaning until you decide how it relates to you or how you relate to it. It is the process of making these associations that will determine the outcome of our experiences in life.

We are creatures of love that have thrust ourselves into what appears to be a world of hate. We once knew there was only one form of love, but now the influence of fear and separation has provided us with the perception that love can exist on several levels. The current levels of love are:

Eros love - known as 'erotic love', is based on strong romantic feelings towards another.

Philos love - a love based on friendship between two people who share a mutual, 'give-and take' relationship.

Agape love - unconditional love that is always giving and impossible to take or be a taker. It devotes total commitment to seek your highest best no matter how anyone may respond. This form of love is totally selfless and does not change whether the love given is returned or not. This is the original and only true form of love.

The description of 'Agape Love' that is accepted by most beliefs as the love that God provides, is identical to how his love is described throughout 'A Course in Miracles', which is founded upon the primary principle that God's love for us has never allowed him to even begin to see us differently, regardless of what we may have done or believe we have done. The Course is repeatedly clear how God never takes and only gives, which is how creation works since God creates by extending he also extended himself into what has come to be known as us, the Son of God.

God never takes...and since we are created in his likeness...with his same method of thinking and being, our true selves (not these ego shrouded human shells) also know this is true. We inherently know that it is never better to take or require that somebody give. Giving is natural and never includes loss of any kind. True giving is like creation in that you do not lose what you give, but you extend that thing and it grows larger as you give it, or share sharing a story or experience.

True giving is rarely experienced on a physical level since we perceive the thing as missing once it is given. On a physical level, you believe you have less after you give or that you have more when you receive. As you can see, this physical world has nothing to do with agape love since this world is based upon taking and having more or upon losing and having less. Agape love is based upon giving through sharing and knowing you already have everything and have nothing to lose. Agape love acknowledges that we are all connected and can only move that thing amongst ourselves, but never outside, so we never lose it. Everything is simply shared.

In a spiritual reality, only thoughts of agape love exist. Nothing else can exist there since everything is in harmony. There is no thought of less or loss or sacrifice since all needs are met before they even exist. This is where the mind of our God exists and it is from here where he teaches us and speaks to us. Every thought or idea that has truly originated from the mind of God, originated from his center of Agape Love.

Since we are no longer centered in agape love, the issue we have while forming relationships is that we tend to severely limit the capacity of the relationship to what we can get from the other or what we think the other wants to take from us. This form of relationship stems from 'philos' love which indicates you share a like mindedness (eg. if you agree with me, I will love you). A philos love relationship is a mutual, 'give-and take' relationship which ends the moment one side either does not get what they want or is asked for something they do not wish to give.

Our confusion on the purpose of love relationships is often then applied to how we think God relates to us, where we imagine that God only loves us when we please him, or that God will only walk with us if we acknowledge him, or that God will only extend his hand and carry us back to him in heaven if we agree with what we think he demands from us. In doing this, we have created a philos love relationship with God which is totally at odds with his agape love since agape love only gives and never takes and is void of any necessary condition. Agape love asks for nothing and gives everything....simply because we are the children of agape love.

Having built walls between ourselves and our creator, we have distanced ourselves from sensing God's love and the world we see around us is a reflection of living without real love. This environment breeds calamity and destruction since that is the result of life based upon fear instead of love. If accepting perfect love can cast out fear, then likewise, accepting fear removes our ability to sense perfect love.

Fortunately, our creator views any problem or tragic moment as an opportunity to reach into our hearts and provide reason for change. No matter what loss appears to have occurred, he is not angry or upset at who we think is at fault because he knows nothing has been lost. Since material things have no eternal value, they do not matter at all to him. In addition, any person you believe has died, is still safe in spirit form, and since God exists spiritually, he does not sense the loss of this being and therefore has no reason to be upset at anyone. His only thought is to help us see that life can be happier... life can be fuller... it is better to be kind... it is better to be loving, and then our time down here will become a focus on preparing ourselves to return to our creator. Regardless of what happens here, He has not and never will lose one of us because we are created eternal spirits, just like him. Jesus proved when he rose again that you can kill the body, but the spirit remains, untouched and unaffected by anything that happens while here in this physical world.

  • Agape love is seeing the answer and sharing that with whoever is seeing or experiencing the problem.
  • Agape love is never judgmental and is eternally patient with any thing that must be learned.
  • Agape love is totally without demands or requirements.
  • Agape love is total truth in that it does not change, no matter what appears to change around it.
  • Agape love knows not of time since time does not exist in heaven.
  • Agape love is unconditional forgiveness for any event because agape love transcends the concept of needing forgiveness in that it knows we are simply misguided and therefore our actions are not held against us in the first place.

Like frightened children running through a dark forest, we act irrationally and do things out of fear and panic. Agape love knows this and seeks only to help us resolve our fears so that we can see clearly once again and return to full communication with our creator.

Nothing physical matters. Nothing can be lost. Nothing can be taken. Nothing needs to be given. In our true form, we know this, but right now we can only recite the words...but we don't really believe them...and that's why we are here. We are in a place where we believe we have been removed from agape love and have written books about a god who does not behave as though he is agape love, but this is not so. The closest our reality can be described here is to think of this as a collective dream on a universal scale. We, the Son of God, attempted to perform something separate from our creator and this is not possible, so instead, this action created a place... a dream, where Gods agape love does not seem to exist...and this is a horrific thought and thus our lives have been horrific.

God has sent the Holy Spirit to help awaken us and to help us see that this world is upside down and totally backwards in thinking. This world teaches taking. God teaches giving. This world teaches sacrifice and guilt. God teaches you have nothing to lose so there is nothing to sacrifice and therefore nothing to make others feel guilty about. This world teaches that fear is necessary to survive, but God teaches that love casts out fear and that we will only truly live when we cast out our fear and embrace agape love once again.

Every lesson, teaching or guideline that ever truly came from God, can only originate from the unchangeable spirit of his unconditional love and endless patience, and his truths, or love, can speak of nothing else. We do know the truth when we hear it because God created us in his image, therefore, we too are agape love. Once we learn to really embrace this, we will remember who we really are and then we'll wake up to see our creator right where he always has been....everywhere...above us, beside us, below us, within us. Everywhere.

Author Commentary

The idea for this article came to me after I had a very long conversation with a friend one day and the subject of God's love came up. My friend had a different perspective of what a loving God was as compared to what I believed a loving God was, and this got me thinking about how any of us saw the concept of love.

I was familiar with the term agape love since it was used often in the evangelical churches I attended as a teen and young adult. Where I became confused was when it became clear to me that many beliefs claim their god is all loving, but the overall relationship is more of a philos love relationship where you earn your right to experience the benefits of your god's love only when you agree with his rules, and you lose this right when you do not acknowledge him.

It made sense very quickly that this was why man has so confused God for thousands of years and why their duel image of him appears to still prevail. Once you agree with a specific belief, you have entered the agape love zone for that belief where you feel your god loves you, however, this often includes the concept that those outside the zone are lost and undeserving of God's eternal blessings and love. The only way for this to be true is if they were on the far side of the philos love relationship where they were not mutually agreeing with God and therefore, God shuns them and will eventually abandon them for all eternity. To have this perspective, however, means that the previously mentioned agape love zone is not really agape love, but simply the experience of being on the high side of a philos love relationship.

This love experience is strictly a perception of how we feel about ourselves and God and has nothing to do with what God already does without question. He loves us all at all times with an eternal agape love. Consider this, if unconditional love had conditions under which it would be applied, how then is it unconditional? Love only exists as agape love. Any other form of love, eros or philos, is simply a shadow or attempt at trying to fathom something beyond our perception at this time, which means, being just perceptions, they do not exist.

God is love.

Author's Bio: 

David Nelmes - David is a Reiki Master, author and teacher who has a genuine and powerful sense of healing, teaching and writing. His desire to share his knowledge about energy work has manifested itself through his web site's services, courses and articles, and they are a testimony to the quality and power of what he has to share. His favorite phrase is, "I am here only to be truly helpful." This is a phrase from A Course in Miracles that he has striven to live by. David's happy goal is to share what he has learned and continues to learn. He extends peace and blessings to all.

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