Want a quick tip on how to survive an affair? Then this article will hopefully be of some help to you. When an affair has caused your marriage to fall apart you need to examine who now has the power to decide whether this marriage will work or not. And in most cases the power resides in your hand, but then naturally you can't simply move on with your life in this marriage knowing that your partner has committed an affair.

So we know that it's very devastating and painful to realize that your marriage didn't turn out to be what you thought it was. The sheer amount of shock and resentment can easily drive your whole marriage into ruin. This doesn't have to be the case if you choose it not to be.

As you read this post you will have a renewed idea of how to move on forward with your marriage by examining some of the underlying feelings you may be experiencing as a direct result of your partner cheating and what the idea of forgiveness can mean to you.

So what does an apology mean to you when the act of cheating is so painful and devastating that it leaves your mind filled with fear, resentment, disgust, anxiety and not knowing whether you should trust them ever again? The first slat in the bridge towards forgiveness is receiving an apology from your partner, and they rightfully owe an apology. Period.

Unfortunately some victims of an affair may never hear an apology from their spouse, and if you haven't received one yet there may be a certain feeling inside of you that's forcing you to hold everything back and stopping you from moving on. You may feel that you're unable to move forward because you're still waiting for your cheating spouse to come out and admit his/her guilt and responsibility. In other words, you have the feeling and the need to be recognized as the victim.

In truth everyone wishes that it was that easy to escape from that painful memory, as you're constantly replaying those horrible images in your head. You may wonder if hearing the word "I'm sorry" from your spouse would mean anything, after what has been done.

The simple truth is that all your efforts to get attention and seeking ways to get your feelings across to your partner is your way of putting forward that you are the victim and you have been hurt through this ordeal. For most people who are victims of an affair, there is a constant need for them to play the role of the victim at all times, and thus they're unable to move past this point.

So once it has been established that you're partner realized that they have caused you pain, which may come in the form of them saying "sorry" you need to gauge whether this is enough and then quickly move on towards the healing process. The problem that most people have is that they need the constant validation of their pain, and they will constantly feed that feeling of pain through seeking some form of recognition that they're the victim.

Now, I'm not saying that you should forget about the amount of pain, anger and anxiety that the affair has caused you, neither am I saying that you're not the victim in this instance. Too many people have the misconception that forgiveness equates to forgetting and in fact this is not the case, as you can probably never forget what has happened, but you can still forgive and move forward in your relationship where the past can be a huge motivation for improvement.

Author's Bio: 

If you're suffering from an affair, experiencing a lack of attention to your needs, unable to communicate with your partner, losing trust and feeling insecure about your marriage then this one program on how to survive an affair can save you from this pain and heart ache, please visit http://www.howtosurviveanaffairblog.com to find out more.